Suddenly jumping up, he put away all idea of sleep, and lowered the window. It was pitch dark; vague changing shapes, which might have been either trees or mere7 fancies of the groping eye, outlined themselves a short distance away; far in front was a dull glare from the engine, and behind twinkled the guard's lamp.... In a few seconds he closed the window again, chilled to the bone, though May was nearly at an end.
The thought occurred to him that he was now a solitary8 upon the face of the earth. It concerned no living person whether he did evil or good. If he chose to seek ruin, to abandon himself to the most ignoble9 impulses, there was none to restrain,—not even a brother-in-law. For several weeks past, he had been troubled about his future, afraid to face it. Certainly London satisfied him, and the charm of living there had not perceptibly grown less. He rejoiced in London, in its vistas10, its shops, its unending crowds, its vastness, its wickedness; each dream dreamed about London in childhood had come true; and surer than ever before was the consciousness that in going to London he had fulfilled his destiny. Yet there was something to lack in himself. His confidence in his own abilities and his own character was being undermined. Nearly a year had gone, and he had made no progress, except at the office. Resolutions were constantly broken; it was three months since he had despatched an article to a newspaper. He had not even followed a definite course of study, and though his acquaintance with modern French fiction had widened, he could boast no exact scholarship even in that piquant11 field. Evening after evening—ah! those long, lamplit evenings which were to be given to strenuous12 effort!—was frittered away upon mean banalities, sometimes in the company of some casual acquaintance and sometimes alone. He had by no means grasped the full import and extent of this retrogression; it was merely beginning to disturb his self-complacence, and perhaps, ever so slightly, his sleep. But now, hurrying to the funeral of William Vernon, he lazily laughed at himself for having allowed his peace of mind to be ruffled14. Why bother about "getting on"? What did it matter?
He still experienced but little sorrow at the death of Vernon. His affection for the man had strangely faded. During the nine months that he had lived in London they had scarcely written to one another, and Richard regarded the long journey to attend William's obsequies as a tiresome15 concession16 to propriety17.
That was his real attitude, had he cared to examine it.
At about four o'clock it was quite light, and the risen sun woke Richard from a brief doze18. The dew lay in the hollows of the fields but elsewhere there was a soft, fresh clearness which gave to the common incidents of the flying landscape a new and virginal beauty—as though that had been the morn of creation itself. The cattle were stirring, and turned to watch the train as it slipped by.
Richard opened the window again. His mood had changed, and he felt unreasonably19 joyous20. Last night he had been too pessimistic. Life lay yet before him, and time enough to rectify21 any indiscretions of which he might have been guilty. The future was his, to use as he liked. Magnificent, consoling thought! Moved by some symbolic22 association of ideas, he put his head out of the window and peered in the direction of the train's motion. A cottage stood alone in the midst of innumerable meadows; as it crossed his vision, the door opened, and a young woman came out with an empty pail swinging in her left hand. Apparently23 she would be about twenty-seven, plump and sturdy and straight. Her hair was loose about her round, contented24 face, and with her disengaged hand she rubbed her eyes, still puffed25 and heavy with sleep. She wore a pink print gown, the bodice of which was unfastened, disclosing a white undergarment and the rich hemispheres of her bosom26. In an instant the scene was hidden by a curve of the line, and the interminable succession of fields resumed, but Richard had time to guess from her figure that the woman was the mother of a small family. He pictured her husband still unconscious in the warm bed which she had just left; he even saw the impress of her head on the pillow, and a long nightdress thrown hastily across a chair.
He was deeply and indescribably affected27 by this suggestion of peaceful married love set in so great a solitude28. The woman and her hypothetical husband and children were only peasants, their lives were probably narrow and their intellects dormant29, yet they aroused in him a feeling of envy which surged about his brain and for the moment asphyxiated30 thought....
Later on the train slackened speed as it passed through a shunting-yard. The steam from the light shunting-engine rose with cloud-like delicacy31 in the clear air, and an occasional short whistle seemed to have something of the quality of a bird's note. The men with their long poles moved blithely32 among the medley33 of rails, signalling one another with motions of the arm. The coupling-chains rang with a merry, giant tinkle34, and when the engine brought its load of waggons35 to a standstill, and a smart, metallic37 bump, bump, bump ran diminuendo from waggon36 to waggon, one might have fancied that some leviathan game was being played. Richard forgot the girl with the pail, and soon after went to sleep.
At six o'clock the train reached Knype, where he had to change. Two women with several children also alighted, and he noticed how white and fatigued38 were their faces; the children yawned pitifully. An icy, searching wind blew through the station; the exhilaration of the dawn was gone, and a spirit of utter woe39 and disaster brooded over everything. For the first time William's death really touched him.
The streets of Bursley were nearly empty as he walked through the town from the railway station, for the industrial population was already at work in the manufactories, and the shops not yet open. Yet Richard avoided the main thoroughfares, choosing a circuitous40 route lest he might by chance encounter an acquaintance. He foresaw the inevitable41 banal13 dialogue:—
"Well, how do you like London?"
"Oh, it's fine!"
"Getting on all right?"
"Yes, thanks."
And then the effort of two secretly bored persons to continue a perfunctory conversation unaided by a single mutual42 interest.
A carriage was driving away from the Red House just as Richard got within sight of it; he nodded to the venerable coachman, who gravely touched his hat. The owner of the carriage was Mr. Clayton Vernon, William's cousin and an alderman of Bursley, and Richard surmised43 that Mrs. Clayton Vernon had put herself in charge of the place until the funeral should be over. He trembled at the prospect44 of a whole day to be spent in the company of these excellent people, whom William had always referred to with a smile, and yet not without a great deal of respect. The Clayton Vernons were the chief buttress45 of respectability in the town; rich, strictly46 religious, philanthropic, and above all dignified47. Everyone looked up to them instinctively48, and had they possessed49 but one vice50 between them, they would have been loved.
Mrs. Clayton Vernon herself opened the door. She was a stately woman of advanced middle age, with a suave51, imperious manner.
"I left Clayton to have breakfast by himself," she said, as she led Richard into the sitting-room52; "I thought you would like someone here to welcome you after your long night journey. Breakfast will be ready almost directly. How tired you must be! Clayton said it was a pity you should come by the night train, but of course it is quite right that you should inconvenience your employers as little as possible, quite right. And we admire you for it. Now will you run upstairs and wash? You've not forgotten the way?..."
The details of the funeral had been settled by Mr. Clayton Vernon, who was the chief mourner, and Richard had nothing to do but fall in with preconcerted plans and answer decorously when spoken to. The arrangement was satisfactory in that it relieved him from duties which would have been irksome, but scarcely gratifying to his pride. He had lived nearly all his life in that house, and had known the dead man perhaps more intimately than anyone else present. However, he found it convenient to efface53 himself.
In the evening there was an elaborate tea at which were present the Clayton Vernons and the minister who had conducted the funeral service. The minister and the alderman left immediately afterwards to attend a meeting, and when they were gone Mrs. Clayton Vernon said,—
"Now we are all alone, Richard. Go into the drawing-room and I will follow. I do want to have a chat with you."
She came in with needle and thread and scissors.
"If you will take off your coat, I will stitch on that button that is hanging by one thread. I noticed it this morning, and then it went quite out of my mind. I am so sorry!"
"Oh, thanks!" he blushed hotly. "But I can stitch myself, you know—"
"Come, you needn't be shy of an old woman seeing you in your shirt-sleeves. Do as I ask."
"I always like young men to be immaculately neat," she said, cutting off a piece of cotton. "One's personal character is an index to one's character, don't you think? Of course you do. Here, thread the needle for me. I am afraid since your dear sister died you have grown a little careless, eh? She was most particular. Ah, what a mother she was to you!"
"Yes," said Richard.
"I was very grieved to see you go to the funeral in a soft hat—Richard, really I was. It wasn't respectful to your brother-in-law's memory."
"I never thought. You see, I started in rather a hurry." The fact was that he had no silk hat, nor could he easily afford to buy one.
"But you should think, my dear boy. Even Clayton was shocked. Are those your best clothes?"
Richard answered that they were. He sheepishly protested that he never bothered about clothes.
There was a silence, broken by her regular stitching. At last she handed him the coat and helped him to put it on. He went to the old green sofa, and somewhat to his dismay she sat down by his side.
"Richard," she began, in a changed, soft voice, and not without emotion, "do you know we are expecting great things from you?"
"But you shouldn't. I'm a very ordinary sort of person."
"No, no. That you are not. God has given you great talents, and you must use them. Poor William always used to say that you were highly gifted and might do great things."
"Might!"
"Yes—if you tried."
"But how am I gifted? And what 'great things' are expected?" he asked, perhaps angling for further flattering disclosures.
"I cannot answer that," said Mrs. Clayton Vernon; "it is for you to answer. You have given all your friends the impression that you would do something worth doing. You have raised hopes, and you must not disappoint them. We believe in you, Richard. That is all I can say."
"That's all very well; but—" He stopped and played with the seal on his watch-chain. "The fact is, I am working, you know. I want to be an author—at least a journalist."
"Ah!"
"It's a slow business—at first—" Suddenly moved to be confidential55, he went on to give her some account, incomplete and judiciously56 edited, of his life during the past year.
"You have relieved my mind greatly, and Clayton will be so glad. We were beginning to think—"
"Why were you 'beginning to think'?"
"Well, never mind now."
"But why?"
"Never mind. I have full confidence in you, and I am sure you will get on. Poor boy, you have no near connections or relatives now?"
"No, none."
"You must look on Clayton and myself as very near relatives. We have no children, but our hearts are large. I shall expect you to write to me sometimes and to come and stay with us now and then."
点击
收听单词发音
收听单词发音 |
1
incessantly
|
|
| ad.不停地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
2
monstrous
|
|
| adj.巨大的；恐怖的；可耻的，丢脸的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
3
rattle
|
|
| v.飞奔，碰响；激怒；n.碰撞声；拨浪鼓 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
4
resonance
|
|
| n.洪亮；共鸣；共振 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
5
skull
|
|
| n.头骨；颅骨 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
6
compartment
|
|
| n.卧车包房，隔间；分隔的空间 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
7
mere
|
|
| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
8
solitary
|
|
| adj.孤独的，独立的，荒凉的；n.隐士 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
9
ignoble
|
|
| adj.不光彩的，卑鄙的；可耻的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
10
vistas
|
|
| 长条形景色( vista的名词复数 )； 回顾； 展望； （未来可能发生的）一系列情景 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
11
piquant
|
|
| adj.辛辣的，开胃的，令人兴奋的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
12
strenuous
|
|
| adj.奋发的，使劲的；紧张的；热烈的，狂热的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
13
banal
|
|
| adj.陈腐的，平庸的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
14
ruffled
|
|
| adj. 有褶饰边的, 起皱的 动词ruffle的过去式和过去分词 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
15
tiresome
|
|
| adj.令人疲劳的，令人厌倦的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
16
concession
|
|
| n.让步，妥协；特许(权) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
17
propriety
|
|
| n.正当行为；正当；适当 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
18
doze
|
|
| v.打瞌睡；n.打盹，假寐 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
19
unreasonably
|
|
| adv. 不合理地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
20
joyous
|
|
| adj.充满快乐的；令人高兴的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
21
rectify
|
|
| v.订正，矫正，改正 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
22
symbolic
|
|
| adj.象征性的，符号的，象征主义的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
23
apparently
|
|
| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
24
contented
|
|
| adj.满意的，安心的，知足的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
25
puffed
|
|
| adj.疏松的v.使喷出( puff的过去式和过去分词 )；喷着汽（或烟）移动；吹嘘；吹捧 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
26
bosom
|
|
| n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
27
affected
|
|
| adj.不自然的，假装的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
28
solitude
|
|
| n. 孤独; 独居,荒僻之地,幽静的地方 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
29
dormant
|
|
| adj.暂停活动的；休眠的；潜伏的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
30
asphyxiated
|
|
| v.渴望的，有抱负的，追求名誉或地位的( aspirant的过去式和过去分词 )；有志向或渴望获得…的人 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
31
delicacy
|
|
| n.精致，细微，微妙，精良；美味，佳肴 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
32
blithely
|
|
| adv.欢乐地，快活地，无挂虑地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
33
medley
|
|
| n.混合 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
34
tinkle
|
|
| vi.叮当作响；n.叮当声 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
35
waggons
|
|
| 四轮的运货马车( waggon的名词复数 )； 铁路货车； 小手推车 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
36
waggon
|
|
| n.运货马车，运货车；敞篷车箱 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
37
metallic
|
|
| adj.金属的；金属制的；含金属的；产金属的；像金属的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
38
fatigued
|
|
| adj. 疲乏的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
39
woe
|
|
| n.悲哀，苦痛，不幸，困难；int.用来表达悲伤或惊慌 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
40
circuitous
|
|
| adj.迂回的路的，迂曲的，绕行的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
41
inevitable
|
|
| adj.不可避免的，必然发生的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
42
mutual
|
|
| adj.相互的，彼此的；共同的，共有的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
43
surmised
|
|
| v.臆测，推断( surmise的过去式和过去分词 )；揣测；猜想 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
44
prospect
|
|
| n.前景，前途；景色，视野 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
45
buttress
|
|
| n.支撑物；v.支持 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
46
strictly
|
|
| adv.严厉地，严格地；严密地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
47
dignified
|
|
| a.可敬的，高贵的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
48
instinctively
|
|
| adv.本能地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
49
possessed
|
|
| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
50
vice
|
|
| n.坏事；恶习；[pl.]台钳，老虎钳；adj.副的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
51
suave
|
|
| adj.温和的；柔和的；文雅的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
52
sitting-room
|
|
| n.（BrE）客厅，起居室 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
53
efface
|
|
| v.擦掉，抹去 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
54
doffed
|
|
| v.脱去，（尤指）脱帽( doff的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
55
confidential
|
|
| adj.秘（机）密的，表示信任的，担任机密工作的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
56
judiciously
|
|
| adv.明断地，明智而审慎地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
| 欢迎访问英文小说网 |