In the evening, the whole party met, as usual, in the library. Marionetta sat at the harp10; the Honourable11 Mr Listless sat by her and turned over her music, though the exertion12 was almost too much for him. The Reverend Mr Larynx relieved him occasionally in this delightful13 labour. Scythrop, tormented14 by the demon15 Jealousy16, sat in the corner biting his lips and fingers. Marionetta looked at him every now and then with a smile of most provoking good humour, which he pretended not to see, and which only the more exasperated17 his troubled spirit. He took down a volume of Dante, and pretended to be deeply interested in the Purgatorio, though he knew not a word he was reading, as Marionetta was well aware; who, tripping across the room, peeped into his book, and said to him, ‘I see you are in the middle of Purgatory18.’—‘I am in the middle of hell,’ said Scythrop furiously. ‘Are you?’ said she; ‘then come across the room, and I will sing you the finale of Don Giovanni.’
‘Let me alone,’ said Scythrop. Marionetta looked at him with a deprecating smile, and said, ‘You unjust, cross creature, you.’—‘Let me alone,’ said Scythrop, but much less emphatically than at first, and by no means wishing to be taken at his word. Marionetta left him immediately, and returning to the harp, said, just loud enough for Scythrop to hear —‘Did you ever read Dante, Mr Listless? Scythrop is reading Dante, and is just now in Purgatory.’—‘And I’ said the Honourable Mr Listless, ‘am not reading Dante, and am just now in Paradise,’ bowing to Marionetta.
MARIONETTA You are very gallant19, Mr Listless; and I dare say you are very fond of reading Dante.
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS I don’t know how it is, but Dante never came in my way till lately. I never had him in my collection, and if I had had him I should not have read him. But I find he is growing fashionable, and I am afraid I must read him some wet morning.
MARIONETTA No, read him some evening, by all means. Were you ever in love, Mr Listless?
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS I assure you, Miss O’Carroll, never — till I came to Nightmare Abbey. I dare say it is very pleasant; but it seems to give so much trouble that I fear the exertion would be too much for me.
MARIONETTA Shall I teach you a compendious20 method of courtship, that will give you no trouble whatever?
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS You will confer on me an inexpressible obligation. I am all impatience21 to learn it.
MARIONETTA Sit with your back to the lady and read Dante; only be sure to begin in the middle, and turn over three or four pages at once — backwards22 as well as forwards, and she will immediately perceive that you are desperately23 in love with her — desperately.
(The Honourable Mr Listless sitting between Scythrop and Marionetta, and fixing all his attention on the beautiful speaker, did not observe Scythrop, who was doing as she described.)
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS You are pleased to be facetious24, Miss O’Carroll. The lady would infallibly conclude that I was the greatest brute25 in town.
MARIONETTA Far from it. She would say, perhaps, some people have odd methods of showing their affection.
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS But I should think, with submission26 —
MR FLOSKY (joining them from another part of the room) Did I not hear Mr Listless observe that Dante is becoming fashionable?
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS I did hazard a remark to that effect, Mr Flosky, though I speak on such subjects with a consciousness of my own nothingness, in the presence of so great a man as Mr Flosky. I know not what is the colour of Dante’s devils, but as he is certainly becoming fashionable I conclude they are blue; for the blue devils, as it seems to me, Mr Flosky, constitute the fundamental feature of fashionable literature.
MR FLOSKY The blue are, indeed, the staple27 commodity; but as they will not always be commanded, the black, red, and grey may be admitted as substitutes. Tea, late dinners, and the French Revolution, have played the devil, Mr Listless, and brought the devil into play.
MR TOOBAD (starting up) Having great wrath.
MR FLOSKY This is no play upon words, but the sober sadness of veritable fact.
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS Tea, late dinners, and the French Revolution. I cannot exactly see the connection of ideas.
MR FLOSKY I should be sorry if you could; I pity the man who can see the connection of his own ideas. Still more do I pity him, the connection of whose ideas any other person can see. Sir, the great evil is, that there is too much common-place light in our moral and political literature; and light is a great enemy to mystery, and mystery is a great friend to enthusiasm. Now the enthusiasm for abstract truth is an exceedingly fine thing, as long as the truth, which is the object of the enthusiasm, is so completely abstract as to be altogether out of the reach of the human faculties28; and, in that sense, I have myself an enthusiasm for truth, but in no other, for the pleasure of metaphysical investigation29 lies in the means, not in the end; and if the end could be found, the pleasure of the means would cease. The mind, to be kept in health, must be kept in exercise. The proper exercise of the mind is elaborate reasoning. Analytical30 reasoning is a base and mechanical process, which takes to pieces and examines, bit by bit, the rude material of knowledge, and extracts therefrom a few hard and obstinate things called facts, every thing in the shape of which I cordially hate. But synthetical32 reasoning, setting up as its goal some unattainable abstraction, like an imaginary quantity in algebra33, and commencing its course with taking for granted some two assertions which cannot be proved, from the union of these two assumed truths produces a third assumption, and so on in infinite series, to the unspeakable benefit of the human intellect. The beauty of this process is, that at every step it strikes out into two branches, in a compound ratio of ramification34; so that you are perfectly35 sure of losing your way, and keeping your mind in perfect health, by the perpetual exercise of an interminable quest; and for these reasons I have christened my eldest36 son Emanuel Kant Flosky.
THE REVEREND MR LARYNX Nothing can be more luminous37.
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS And what has all that to do with Dante, and the blue devils?
MR HILARY Not much, I should think, with Dante, but a great deal with the blue devils.
MR FLOSKY It is very certain, and much to be rejoiced at, that our literature is hag-ridden. Tea has shattered our nerves; late dinners make us slaves of indigestion; the French Revolution has made us shrink from the name of philosophy, and has destroyed, in the more refined part of the community (of which number I am one), all enthusiasm for political liberty. That part of the reading public which shuns38 the solid food of reason for the light diet of fiction, requires a perpetual adhibition of sauce piquante to the palate of its depraved imagination. It lived upon ghosts, goblins, and skeletons (I and my friend Mr Sackbut served up a few of the best), till even the devil himself, though magnified to the size of Mount Athos, became too base, common, and popular, for its surfeited39 appetite. The ghosts have therefore been laid, and the devil has been cast into outer darkness, and now the delight of our spirits is to dwell on all the vices40 and blackest passions of our nature, tricked out in a masquerade dress of heroism42 and disappointed benevolence43; the whole secret of which lies in forming combinations that contradict all our experience, and affixing44 the purple shred45 of some particular virtue46 to that precise character, in which we should be most certain not to find it in the living world; and making this single virtue not only redeem47 all the real and manifest vices of the character, but make them actually pass for necessary adjuncts, and indispensable accompaniments and characteristics of the said virtue.
MR TOOBAD That is, because the devil is come among us, and finds it for his interest to destroy all our perceptions of the distinctions of right and wrong.
MARIONETTA I do not precisely48 enter into your meaning, Mr Flosky, and should be glad if you would make it a little more plain to me.
MR FLOSKY One or two examples will do it, Miss O’Carroll. If I were to take all the mean and sordid49 qualities of a money-dealing Jew, and tack50 on to them, as with a nail, the quality of extreme benevolence, I should have a very decent hero for a modern novel; and should contribute my quota51 to the fashionable method of administering a mass of vice41, under a thin and unnatural52 covering of virtue, like a spider wrapt in a bit of gold leaf, and administered as a wholesome53 pill. On the same principle, if a man knocks me down, and takes my purse and watch by main force, I turn him to account, and set him forth54 in a tragedy as a dashing young fellow, disinherited for his romantic generosity55, and full of a most amiable56 hatred57 of the world in general, and his own country in particular, and of a most enlightened and chivalrous58 affection for himself: then, with the addition of a wild girl to fall in love with him, and a series of adventures in which they break all the Ten Commandments in succession (always, you will observe, for some sublime59 motive60, which must be carefully analysed in its progress), I have as amiable a pair of tragic62 characters as ever issued from that new region of the belles63 lettres, which I have called the Morbid64 Anatomy65 of Black Bile, and which is greatly to be admired and rejoiced at, as affording a fine scope for the exhibition of mental power.
MR HILARY Which is about as well employed as the power of a hothouse would be in forcing up a nettle66 to the size of an elm. If we go on in this way, we shall have a new art of poetry, of which one of the first rules will be: To remember to forget that there are any such things as sunshine and music in the world.
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS It seems to be the case with us at present, or we should not have interrupted Miss O’Carroll’s music with this exceedingly dry conversation.
MR FLOSKY I should be most happy if Miss O’Carroll would remind us that there are yet both music and sunshine —
THE HONOURABLE MR LISTLESS In the voice and the smile of beauty. May I entreat67 the favour of —(turning over the pages of music.)
All were silent, and Marionetta sung:
Why are thy looks so blank, grey friar?
Why are thy looks so blue?
Thou seem’st more pale and lank68, grey friar,
Than thou wast used to do:—
Say, what has made thee rue69?
Thy form was plump, and a light did shine
In thy round and ruby70 face,
Which showed an outward visible sign
Of an inward spiritual grace:—
Say, what has changed thy case?
Yet will I tell thee true, grey friar,
I very well can see,
That, if thy looks are blue, grey friar,
’Tis all for love of me —
’Tis all for love of me.
But breathe not thy vows71 to me, grey friar,
Oh, breathe them not, I pray;
For ill beseems in a reverend friar,
The love of a mortal may;
And I needs must say thee nay72.
But, could’st thou think my heart to move
With that pale and silent scowl73?
Know, he who would win a maiden’s love,
Whether clad in cap or cowl,
Must be more of a lark74 than an owl31.
Scythrop immediately replaced Dante on the shelf, and joined the circle round the beautiful singer. Marionetta gave him a smile of approbation75 that fully61 restored his complacency, and they continued on the best possible terms during the remainder of the evening. The Honourable Mr Listless turned over the leaves with double alacrity76, saying, ‘You are severe upon invalids77, Miss O’Carroll: to escape your satire78, I must try to be sprightly79, though the exertion is too much for me.’
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1
determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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interfere
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| v.(in)干涉，干预；(with)妨碍，打扰 | |
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obedience
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| n.服从，顺从 | |
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obstinate
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| adj.顽固的，倔强的，不易屈服的，较难治愈的 | |
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chamber
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| n.房间，寝室；会议厅；议院；会所 | |
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conjecture
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| n./v.推测，猜测 | |
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intervals
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| n.[军事]间隔( interval的名词复数 )；间隔时间；[数学]区间；（戏剧、电影或音乐会的）幕间休息 | |
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8
fugitive
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| adj.逃亡的，易逝的；n.逃犯，逃亡者 | |
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9
wrath
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| n.愤怒，愤慨，暴怒 | |
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harp
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| n.竖琴；天琴座 | |
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honourable
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| adj.可敬的；荣誉的，光荣的 | |
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12
exertion
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| n.尽力，努力 | |
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delightful
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| adj.令人高兴的，使人快乐的 | |
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14
tormented
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| 饱受折磨的 | |
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demon
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| n.魔鬼，恶魔 | |
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jealousy
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| n.妒忌，嫉妒，猜忌 | |
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17
exasperated
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| adj.恼怒的 | |
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18
purgatory
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| n.炼狱；苦难；adj.净化的，清洗的 | |
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19
gallant
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| adj.英勇的，豪侠的；(向女人)献殷勤的 | |
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20
compendious
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| adj.简要的，精简的 | |
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21
impatience
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| n.不耐烦，急躁 | |
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22
backwards
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| adv.往回地，向原处，倒，相反，前后倒置地 | |
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23
desperately
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| adv.极度渴望地，绝望地，孤注一掷地 | |
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24
facetious
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| adj.轻浮的，好开玩笑的 | |
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25
brute
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| n.野兽，兽性 | |
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26
submission
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| n.服从，投降；温顺，谦虚；提出 | |
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27
staple
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| n.主要产物，常用品，主要要素，原料，订书钉，钩环；adj.主要的，重要的；vt.分类 | |
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28
faculties
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| n.能力( faculty的名词复数 )；全体教职员；技巧；院 | |
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29
investigation
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| n.调查，调查研究 | |
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30
analytical
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| adj.分析的；用分析法的 | |
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31
owl
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| n.猫头鹰，枭 | |
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32
synthetical
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| adj.综合的，合成的 | |
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33
algebra
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| n.代数学 | |
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34
ramification
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| n.分枝，分派，衍生物 | |
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35
perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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36
eldest
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| adj.最年长的，最年老的 | |
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37
luminous
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| adj.发光的，发亮的；光明的；明白易懂的；有启发的 | |
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38
shuns
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| v.避开，回避，避免( shun的第三人称单数 ) | |
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39
surfeited
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| v.吃得过多( surfeit的过去式和过去分词 )；由于过量而厌腻 | |
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40
vices
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| 缺陷( vice的名词复数 )； 恶习； 不道德行为； 台钳 | |
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41
vice
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| n.坏事；恶习；[pl.]台钳，老虎钳；adj.副的 | |
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42
heroism
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| n.大无畏精神，英勇 | |
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43
benevolence
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| n.慈悲，捐助 | |
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44
affixing
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| v.附加( affix的现在分词 )；粘贴；加以；盖（印章） | |
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45
shred
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| v.撕成碎片，变成碎片；n.碎布条，细片，些少 | |
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46
virtue
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| n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力 | |
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47
redeem
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| v.买回，赎回，挽回，恢复，履行（诺言等） | |
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48
precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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49
sordid
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| adj.肮脏的，不干净的，卑鄙的，暗淡的 | |
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50
tack
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| n.大头钉；假缝，粗缝 | |
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51
quota
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| n.（生产、进出口等的）配额，（移民的）限额 | |
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52
unnatural
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| adj.不自然的；反常的 | |
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53
wholesome
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| adj.适合；卫生的；有益健康的；显示身心健康的 | |
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54
forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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55
generosity
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| n.大度，慷慨，慷慨的行为 | |
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56
amiable
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| adj.和蔼可亲的，友善的，亲切的 | |
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57
hatred
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| n.憎恶，憎恨，仇恨 | |
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58
chivalrous
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| adj.武士精神的；对女人彬彬有礼的 | |
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59
sublime
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| adj.崇高的，伟大的；极度的，不顾后果的 | |
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60
motive
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| n.动机，目的；adv.发动的，运动的 | |
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61
fully
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| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
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62
tragic
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| adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的 | |
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63
belles
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| n.美女( belle的名词复数 )；最美的美女 | |
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64
morbid
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| adj.病的；致病的；病态的；可怕的 | |
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65
anatomy
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| n.解剖学，解剖；功能，结构，组织 | |
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66
nettle
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| n.荨麻；v.烦忧，激恼 | |
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67
entreat
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| v.恳求，恳请 | |
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68
lank
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| adj.瘦削的；稀疏的 | |
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69
rue
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| n.懊悔，芸香，后悔；v.后悔，悲伤，懊悔 | |
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70
ruby
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| n.红宝石，红宝石色 | |
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71
vows
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| 誓言( vow的名词复数 )； 郑重宣布，许愿 | |
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72
nay
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| adv.不；n.反对票，投反对票者 | |
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73
scowl
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| vi.(at)生气地皱眉，沉下脸，怒视；n.怒容 | |
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74
lark
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| n.云雀，百灵鸟；n.嬉戏，玩笑；vi.嬉戏 | |
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75
approbation
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| n.称赞；认可 | |
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76
alacrity
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| n.敏捷，轻快，乐意 | |
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77
invalids
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| 病人，残疾者( invalid的名词复数 ) | |
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78
satire
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| n.讽刺，讽刺文学，讽刺作品 | |
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sprightly
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| adj.愉快的，活泼的 | |
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