Hastily, with Ellen’s aid, she packed a few things into her little portmanteau. She put in just what she would most need for some evenings’ stay; she put in also her diamonds and the rest of her jewellery, not omitting the coral necklet Will Deverill gave her long ago in the Tyrol. Luckily, she had in her desk the week’s money for the housekeeping. She took it out?—?it was her own?—?and turned more calmly to Ellen. “My child,” she said, laying two sovereigns in her hand, “will you come with me where I go? Remember, Mr Hausberger says you’re his servant.”
And the girl, looking up at her with a burst of compassion4 and enthusiastic affection, made answer at once: “I’d go with you, Signora, if they was to cut off my head for it. How dare he ever treat you so?—?such a man as him?—?and you a lady anyone ’ud love to die for!”
“Thank you, dear,” Linnet said, much touched; for to her, even her servants were perfectly5 human. “Then run up and put your things on as fast as you can, and ask Maria to call a hansom.”
When it came to the door, she stepped in, and Ellen after her. “Where shall I drive, Mum?” the cabman asked. And Linnet, through the flap, made answer boldly, “To Duke Street, St James’s.”
“That’s where Mr Deverill lives, ma’am, isn’t it?” Ellen interposed, somewhat tremulously.
“Yes, child,” Linnet answered, with a choking voice, but very firmly still, for she had quite made her mind up. “Mr Deverill lives there?—?and I’m going to Mr Deverill’s. I’ve no right to go?—?but I’m going, all the same. If you’d rather not come, you can leave me at the door. You know what it means. Perhaps it would be better.”
The girl glanced back at her, all flushed. “I don’t care a pin whether it’s right or whether it’s wrong,” she answered warmly. “I’ll go with you to the world’s end. I’ll go with you anywhere. I’d go with you if you was going to the worst house in London.”
Linnet answered nothing. She was red with shame?—?the very words appalled6 her?—?but she meant to go through with it. Too long had she trampled7 her own heart under foot; now her heart would have its way, and she meant to allow it. Her fiery8 Southern blood had got the better of her. She would fly from the man who had married her only for what he could make of her, to the man she had always truly loved?—?the man who had always truly loved her.
“Is Mr Deverill in?” she asked with a beating heart of the servant at the lodgings9. And when the man answered, “Yes, ma’am,” in an unconcerned tone, her heart rose like a lump in her throat within her.
But she kept her exterior10 coolness. “Bring in the portmanteau, Ellen,” she said, with a quiet air of command; and the girl obeyed her. “Now, sit there in the hall till I come down again and call you.”
She trod the stairs like a queen. Will Deverill was seated at his desk at work, when the servant flung open the door with a flourish, and announced, in his most grandiose11 tone, “Signora Casalmonte!”
Will looked up in surprise, and saw Linnet before him.
Her face, which had been flushed five minutes earlier, was now pale and bloodless with intense excitement. Marks of fingers stood out on her neck and wrists; a slight bruise12 scarred the surface of her smooth left temple. But she was beautiful still, in spite of all such accidents?—?very beautiful and winning. She stood a second and gazed at him. At sight of her one true love, her bosom13 rose and fell; that strange wave of delight she had felt at Innsbruck, and again at the Harmony, thrilled once more through and through her. Of a sudden, as she paused, her face flushed rosy14 red again, her eyes grew bright, her full throat heaved and panted. She spread out her arms towards him with a hasty little quiver. “O Will, Will, Will,” she cried, in a voice of complete and intense self-surrender; “at last?—?I have come to you!”
Will rose in surprise and moved across to her, trembling. He seized her two hands in his and gazed at her longingly15. “Linnet, dear Linnet,” he cried, drawing a very deep breath; “what has brought you here to-day? What on earth do you mean by it?”
But Linnet had flung away all artificial restraints and conventions now. She abandoned herself to her love with the perfect abandonment of a pure and good woman, when once she has made up her mind to repress nature no longer. With a wild impulse of delight, she flung herself bodily into her lover’s arms. She flung herself into Will’s arms, and buried her head confidingly16 on his tender shoulder. Then she broke into a storm of deep-drawn sobs17. “It means,” she cried, between little bursts, “I’ve left him for ever. That man I never loved, I’ve left him for ever. And I’ve come home at last where I ought to have come to nestle long ago. Will, Will, dear Will?—?will you take me? May I stop with you?”
In a transport of joy, Will clasped her to his bosom. Not to have done so, indeed, would have been more?—?or less?—?than human. No man can even pretend to be otherwise than overjoyed when the woman he loves flings herself into his arms for the first time in a fierce access of passion. He clasped her long and hard, breast pressed against heaving breast, and lips meeting lips in a sharp shower of kisses. For some minutes they neither knew, nor felt, nor remembered, nor thought of anything else on earth save their present intoxication18. But surely those minutes were in themselves worth living for! What mattered so many years of cruel and unnatural19 repression20 beside that one fierce draught21 at the hot wine of passion?
After a while, however, Will woke up to a true sense of the situation. Man though he was, and therefore aggressive, it was his duty first of all to think of protecting Linnet. He must protect her, if need were, even against her own impulses. He must learn what she meant, and what could have led her so suddenly to this strange decision?—?so unlike herself, so untrue, as it seemed, to her whole past history.
He unwound his arms gently, and placed the poor sobbing22, throbbing23 girl, half-unresisted, in an arm-chair by the fireplace. Then he drew up a seat for himself very close by her side, took her hand in his, and soothed24 it gently with his other one. “He’s been cruel to you, Linnet, I can see,” he murmured softly at her ear. “Now, what has led you to this? Tell me all he has done to you.”
Thereat, Linnet, holding his hand hard, and looking deep into his eyes, yet crimson25 for very shame, began in her own tongue the story of their interview. She hid nothing from Will, and extenuated26 nothing. She told him in full how Joaquin Holmes had brought her Andreas’s letter to Philippina and offered it for sale; how she had refused to buy it, or have anything to do with it; how he had dropped it by accident and she had picked it up before him, intending to restore it to its rightful owner; how a scuffle had ensued, in the midst of which Andreas had unexpectedly entered; how in his wrath27 at being discovered, he had fairly lost his temper, and provoked her for once to an act of rebellion; and how in his rage at her note he had turned upon her bodily, and inflicted28 the marks Will could see so plainly now upon her person. Only the question of divorce she never touched on; a certain feminine delicacy29 made her shrink from alluding30 to it. Will listened to every word with profound attention, letting her tell her own tale her own way, unquestioned, but stroking her hand from time to time very gently with his own, or smoothing her fiery cheeks with the tips of his fingers in silent sympathy.
At last she ceased, and looked hard at Will, inquiringly.
“So I’ve come to you, Will,” she said, in her simple way, with childlike confidence; “and, now I’ve come, may I stop with you always? May I never go away again?”
Will’s heart beat high. Her loving trust, her perfect self-surrender, could not fail to touch him. Yet he gazed at her ruefully. “My darling,” he said with a burst, belying31 his words as he spoke32 by laying her soft head once more in the hollow of his shoulder; “you shouldn’t have come to me. You’ve done very very wrong?—?very foolishly I mean. I’m the exact last person on earth you should have come to.”
Linnet nestled to him close. “But I love you,” she cried, pleadingly. “You’re the only living soul I’d have cared to come to.”
“Yes, yes; I know,” Will answered hastily. “I didn’t mean that, of course. You’re mine, mine, mine! Sooner or later, now, you must certainly come to me. But for the present, darling, I mean, it’s so unwise, so foolish. It’ll prejudice your case, if it ever comes to be heard of. We must take you somewhere else?—?somewhere free from all blame, don’t you see?—?for the immediate33 future.”
“Prejudice my case!” Linnet exclaimed, looking up at him in amazement34, and growing more shamefaced still with awe35 at her own boldness. “You must take me somewhere else! Ah, Will, I don’t understand you. No, no; I must stop here?—?I must stop here with you for ever. I’ve broken away from him now; I’ve broken away from everything. I can never, never go back. I’m yours, and yours only.”
“No; you can never go back, Linnet,” Will answered decisively. “You’re mine, darling, mine, mine, mine only”; and he kissed her again fervently36. “But we must be prudent37, of course, if we’re to make this thing straight before the eyes of the world; and for your sake, dearest, you must see yourself how absolutely necessary it is that we should make it so.”
Linnet gazed at him once more in childlike astonishment38. She failed utterly39 to comprehend him. “What do you mean, Will?” she faltered40 out. “You don’t mean to say I’m not to stop with you?”
Her eyes filled fast with tears, and her face looked up at his, full of wistful pleading. She clung to him so tight, in her love and her terror, that Will bent41 over her yet again and covered her with kisses. “Yes, darling; you’re to stop with me,” he cried; “to stop with me all your life?—?but not just at present. We must make this thing straight in the regular way first. Meanwhile, you must stay with some friend?—?some lady whose name is above suspicion. All must be carefully arranged. Even to have come here to-night may be positively42 fatal. We must play our cards cautiously. You’ve kept the letter?”
Linnet drew it, much crumpled43, from the folds of her bosom, and handed it to him at once, without a moment’s hesitation44. What he meant, she couldn’t imagine. Will ran his eye over it hastily. Then he glanced at the deep red marks on her neck, and her half-bared arm?—?for she had rolled back her sleeve like a child to show him. “This is conclusive,” he said slowly. “Prudent man as he is, he has cut his own throat. And you had a witness, too?—?a friendly witness; that’s lucky. We must take you to a doctor, and let him see you to-night, as soon as ever we’ve arranged where you can sleep this evening. The evidence of cruelty?—?and of the other thing?—?is more than sufficient. No court in England would refuse you a divorce upon such conduct.”
Linnet started at the word. “Divorce!” she cried, growing redder and still redder with shame. “Oh, Will, not that, not that! You don’t understand me. Divorce would be no use in the world to me. I’m a Catholic, you must remember, and I could never, never marry you. If I did, it would only be a mockery and a snare45. It would be worse than sin; it would be open rebellion. I want no divorce; I want only to be allowed to stop here with you for ever.”
She laid her hand on his arm, as if to draw him to herself in some natural symbolism. Her face was flushed with her womanly modesty46. She hid it once more like a shy child on his shoulder. Will looked at her, sore puzzled. How strange that this pure and passionate47 nature should see things in a light that to him was so unfamiliar48! But he remembered what she had said to him in Philippina’s trouble, and began to understand now in what manner she regarded it.
“Well, but, Linnet,” he cried eagerly lifting her head from where she put it, and laying her cheek against his own, “you must see for yourself how much better it would be, if only from the mere49 worldly point of view, to arrange this matter as the world would arrange it. Granting even that a marriage after an English divorce would mean to you, from the strictly50 religious standpoint, simply nothing?—?why, surely, even then, it must be no small matter to set oneself right with the world, to be received and acknowledged as an honest woman, and my wife, in ordinary English society. If we get a divorce, we can do all that; and to get a divorce, we must act now circumspectly51. But if we don’t get one, and if you try to stop here with me without it?—?remember, dear, the penalty; you lose position at once, and become for society an utter outcast.”
Linnet flung herself upon him once more in a perfect fervour of abandonment. Her love and her shame were fighting hard within her. Her passionate Southern nature overcame her entirely52. “Will, Will, dear Will,” she cried, hiding her face from him yet again, “you don’t understand; you can’t fathom53 the depth of the sacrifice I would make for you. I come to you to-day bringing my life in my hand?—?my eternal life, my soul, my future; I offer you all I have, all I am, all I will be. For you I give up my good name, my faith, my hopes of salvation54. For you I will endure the worst tortures of purgatory55. I’ve tried to keep away?—?I’ve tried hard to keep away?—?Our Dear Lady knows how hard?—?all these months, all these years?—?but I can keep away no longer. Two great powers seemed to pull different ways within me. My Church said to me plainly, ‘You must never think of him; you must stop with Andreas.’ My heart said to me no less plainly, but a thousand times more persuasively56, ‘You must fly from that man’s side; you must go to Will Deverill.’ I knew, if I followed my heart, the fires of hell would rise up and take hold of me. I haven’t minded for that; I’ve dared the fires of hell; the two have fought it out?—?the Church and my heart?—?and, my heart has conquered.”
She paused, and drew a great sigh. “Dear Will,” she went on softly, burying her head yet deeper in that tender bosom, “if I got a divorce, the divorce would be nothing to me?—?a mere waste paper. What people think of me matters little, very little in my mind, compared to what God and my Church will say of me. If I stop with you here, I shall be living in open sin; but I shall be living with the man my heart loves best; I shall have at least my own heart’s unmixed approval. While I lived with Andreas, the Church and God approved; but my own heart told me, every night of my life, I was living in sin, unspeakable sin against human nature and my own body. Oh, Will, I don’t know why, but it somehow seems as if God and our hearts were at open war; you must live by one or you must live by the other. If I stop with you, I’m living by my own heart’s law; I will take the sin upon me; I will pay the penalty. If God punishes me for it at last?—?well, I will take my punishment and bear it bravely; I won’t flinch57 from pain; I won’t shrink from the fires of hell or purgatory. But, at least, I do it all with my eyes wide open. I know I’m disobeying God’s law for the law of my own heart. I won’t profane58 God’s holy sacrament of marriage by asking a heretical and un-Catholic Church to bless a union which is all my own?—?my own heart’s making, not God’s ordinance59, God’s sacrament. I love you so well, darling, I can never leave you. Let me stop with you, Will; let me stop with you! Let me live with you; let me die with you; let me burn in hell-fire for you!”
A man is a man. And the man within Will Deverill drove him on irresistibly60. He clasped her hard once more to his straining bosom. “As you wish,” he said, quivering. “Your will is law, Linnet.”
“No, no,” she cried, nestling against him, with a satisfied sigh of delight. “My law is Will.” And she looked up and smiled at her own little conceit61. “You shall do as you wish with me.”
点击
收听单词发音
收听单词发音 |
1
brutally
|
|
| adv.残忍地，野蛮地，冷酷无情地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
2
wring
|
|
| n.扭绞；v.拧，绞出，扭 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
3
decided
|
|
| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
4
compassion
|
|
| n.同情，怜悯 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
5
perfectly
|
|
| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
6
appalled
|
|
| v.使惊骇，使充满恐惧( appall的过去式和过去分词)adj.惊骇的；丧胆的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
7
trampled
|
|
| 踩( trample的过去式和过去分词 )； 践踏； 无视； 侵犯 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
8
fiery
|
|
| adj.燃烧着的，火红的；暴躁的；激烈的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
9
lodgings
|
|
| n. 出租的房舍, 寄宿舍 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
10
exterior
|
|
| adj.外部的，外在的；表面的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
11
grandiose
|
|
| adj.宏伟的，宏大的，堂皇的，铺张的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
12
bruise
|
|
| n.青肿，挫伤；伤痕；vt.打青；挫伤 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
13
bosom
|
|
| n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
14
rosy
|
|
| adj.美好的，乐观的，玫瑰色的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
15
longingly
|
|
| adv. 渴望地 热望地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
16
confidingly
|
|
| adv.信任地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
17
sobs
|
|
| 啜泣（声），呜咽（声）( sob的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
18
intoxication
|
|
| n.wild excitement;drunkenness；poisoning | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
19
unnatural
|
|
| adj.不自然的；反常的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
20
repression
|
|
| n.镇压，抑制，抑压 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
21
draught
|
|
| n.拉，牵引，拖；一网（饮，吸，阵)；顿服药量，通风；v.起草，设计 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
22
sobbing
|
|
| <主方>Ⅰ adj.湿透的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
23
throbbing
|
|
| a. 跳动的,悸动的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
24
soothed
|
|
| v.安慰( soothe的过去式和过去分词 )；抚慰；使舒服；减轻痛苦 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
25
crimson
|
|
| n./adj.深(绯)红色(的)；vi.脸变绯红色 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
26
extenuated
|
|
| v.（用偏袒的辩解或借口）减轻( extenuate的过去式和过去分词 )；低估，藐视 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
27
wrath
|
|
| n.愤怒，愤慨，暴怒 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
28
inflicted
|
|
| 把…强加给，使承受，遭受( inflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
29
delicacy
|
|
| n.精致，细微，微妙，精良；美味，佳肴 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
30
alluding
|
|
| 提及，暗指( allude的现在分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
31
belying
|
|
| v.掩饰，与…不符，使…失望；掩饰( belie的现在分词 )；证明（或显示）…为虚假；辜负；就…扯谎 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
32
spoke
|
|
| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
33
immediate
|
|
| adj.立即的；直接的，最接近的；紧靠的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
34
amazement
|
|
| n.惊奇，惊讶 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
35
awe
|
|
| n.敬畏，惊惧；vt.使敬畏，使惊惧 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
36
fervently
|
|
| adv.热烈地，热情地，强烈地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
37
prudent
|
|
| adj.谨慎的，有远见的，精打细算的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
38
astonishment
|
|
| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
39
utterly
|
|
| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
40
faltered
|
|
| （嗓音）颤抖( falter的过去式和过去分词 )； 支吾其词； 蹒跚； 摇晃 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
41
bent
|
|
| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
42
positively
|
|
| adv.明确地，断然，坚决地；实在，确实 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
43
crumpled
|
|
| adj. 弯扭的, 变皱的 动词crumple的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
44
hesitation
|
|
| n.犹豫，踌躇 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
45
snare
|
|
| n.陷阱，诱惑，圈套；（去除息肉或者肿瘤的）勒除器；响弦，小军鼓；vt.以陷阱捕获，诱惑 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
46
modesty
|
|
| n.谦逊，虚心，端庄，稳重，羞怯，朴素 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
47
passionate
|
|
| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
48
unfamiliar
|
|
| adj.陌生的，不熟悉的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
49
mere
|
|
| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
50
strictly
|
|
| adv.严厉地，严格地；严密地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
51
circumspectly
|
|
| adv.慎重地，留心地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
52
entirely
|
|
| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
53
fathom
|
|
| v.领悟，彻底了解 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
54
salvation
|
|
| n.（尤指基督）救世，超度，拯救，解困 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
55
purgatory
|
|
| n.炼狱；苦难；adj.净化的，清洗的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
56
persuasively
|
|
| adv.口才好地；令人信服地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
57
flinch
|
|
| v.畏缩，退缩 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
58
profane
|
|
| adj.亵神的，亵渎的；vt.亵渎，玷污 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
59
ordinance
|
|
| n.法令；条令；条例 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
60
irresistibly
|
|
| adv.无法抵抗地，不能自持地；极为诱惑人地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
61
conceit
|
|
| n.自负，自高自大 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
| 欢迎访问英文小说网 |