Frank Hamilton looked down at his handiwork and found it good. But still he fidgeted with the back of a chair as he surveyed it, and his eyes were bright with some mental or physical excitement. He was not often restless, but to-night his nerves were evidently on edge. His teeth gnawed7 his lower lip and his eyes constantly sought the clock.
Then, after giving a last touch to the table, he pulled out a bunch of keys from his pocket and unlocked a[275] corner cupboard where he kept liqueurs and wines. He never forgot to lock that cupboard, no matter how late his company left or how high his visions had soared, for he had a great mistrust of servants. His usual manner was half dreamy, rather abstracted, as though the sordid8 details of everyday life passed him by, but the impression that he gave was misleading. Often his mind was most practical when his eyes seemed only to hold vague dreams and beautiful, unworldly ideals, and if anyone thought to drive an easy bargain at such a time he found himself mistaken. As a child at school Frank had always managed to elude9 just punishment by that same manner of aloofness10 from desks and copybooks, and from quite early manhood women had taught him to realize how that air, combined with obvious good looks and the reputation for “temperament,” could be made valuable. The way in which his eyes would light up with sudden enthusiasm, the frank expressions of admiration11 which came easily to his lips, the appeal which he made by a seemingly exclusive devotion to the woman of the moment, had always made him a favourite with the fair sex, who contrasted him with the more phlegmatic12 males of their acquaintance to his great advantage, for “it’s the high-falutin stuff the women bite on.”
Men did not like Frank Hamilton, and he was seldom seen in their company. A few artists dropped in on him occasionally to talk “shop,” but they were never heard to speak of him with any enthusiasm. Indeed, among them he had the reputation for being “close,” and that happy-go-lucky, jovial13 crowd that lends and borrows with equal ease found this unforgivable. He was not willing to “part,” nor did he try to put commissions in their way, and lately, as de Bleriot had been heard to say at the Chelsea Arts Club, “Hamilton’s getting altogether too big for his boots.”
After Frank had put the liqueurs on the sideboard,[276] he noticed that the card which had been attached to the bunch of roses he had just arranged had fallen to the ground. He picked it up and re-read it with a little smile of amusement.
“To the greatest of artists and my dear friend. M.J.”
With a laugh, he tore it up into fragments and threw the pieces in the fire. “Maria Jacobs! Maria Jacobs! Well, the roses have come in handy”—mockingly—“thank you, Maria.”
As the last fragment was consumed, the door-bell rang, and he went out into the hall to receive his visitor.
“I am afraid I am a little late,” apologized Claudia, letting him take her cloak, “but—— Oh, well! the Bridgemans are later, it seems, so I shan’t apologize any more.”
He drew her into the dining-room and kissed her.
“Don’t! You are crushing the poor primroses14. Are they not sweet? Don’t you love the frailty15 and delicate sweetness of wild flowers?”
She was very sweet herself as she said it, her eyes taking in approvingly the decorations of the table. But she was also to him still a little grande dame16, with her dignified17 carriage and her head held high. For a moment doubt knocked at his confident heart. It would all depend how she took his news. The next few minutes would decide his fate.
“Claudia, I have a disappointment for you. I have just had a wire from the Bridgemans. She is ill and they cannot come.” He was watching her narrowly, although the words were spoken easily enough. “There was no time to get another couple. The wire arrived a few minutes ago. You can see the table is set for them. Do you mind, dearest?”
For a moment she hesitated. She had a curious sudden[277] feeling of fright, like someone who sees a gate closing behind her.
“Of course,” he said lightly, “it’s not quite comme il faut, but neither you nor I care about that, do we? We will go to a restaurant if you prefer. It’s a pity the Bridgemans didn’t let me know sooner.”
The room was very cozy18 and inviting19. The situation was compromising; but then, as Frank said, did she care about small conventionalities? No one would know. It was only Mother Grundy who would drive them forth20 to a noisy, rag-time restaurant where they would hardly be able to hear one another speak. The country air had made her agreeably tired, so that the mellow21 light of the candles and the room perched high above the traffic appealed to her mood. Had he made the least attempt to persuade her she would not have stayed, but he was wise enough to make it seem a matter of indifference22 where they dined so long as they were together.
“I’m tired of the clatter23 of restaurants,” she said, sinking into a chair by the hearth24; “and I smell a smell of savoury baked meats. It’s very peaceful here at night.”
“Marshall isn’t at all a bad cook,” returned Frank lightly, “and I told her to think out a specially25 nice dinner.”
“For the Bridgemans or—for me?”
The momentary26 sensation of panic had passed. He was just as he always was, devoted27, deferential28, entirely29 at her command.
“For the Bridgemans, of course. Need you ask?” He took the pretty arm lying on the arm of the chair and let his lips gently slip along the skin from the elbow to the wrist. “Claudia, I can’t think of anyone but you these days.”
“Just an infatuation!” she laughed provocatively30, a thrill running through her.
[278]
“Are you sorry that I am so infatuated? Would you have me more cool and reasonable? You told me once that you hated tepid31 people. Have you changed your ideas?”
“No.”
“How charming! It’s Jacobean, isn’t it? I shall enjoy sitting in it.”
Part of the face was in shadow, but the light fell full on the soft, curving lips, very sweet and gracious to-night, the firm, well-moulded chin, and the exquisite33 line of the bare neck and shoulders.
“No. Why do you ask?”
“Colin Paton knows an architect further down, Leonard Gost. I wonder if you knew him too.”
Frank shook his head. “No, but I happened to hear this morning that he had been suddenly taken ill. The doctor came here by mistake. Don’t let’s talk about Paton.”
“Why? Don’t you like him?”
“I’m jealous of every man you even see. That day I came in and found him holding your hand I could have slain35 him.”
She smiled, and then the smile suddenly vanished and was replaced by a more thoughtful expression.
“Are you, then, jealous of my husband?” she asked suddenly.
The question was unexpected, and for a moment he had no answer ready.
“Why, yes; of course, I——”
“No, I see you are not. How curious! I think if I were in love with a married woman I should be morbidly36 jealous of her husband. My imagination would torture me, the grey matter in my brain would turn a[279] bright orange with jealous hate.” She had never spoken to him of her relations with her husband. He had never asked any questions, and she had volunteered no information. But sometimes she had wondered that Frank could take his existence and rights so calmly.
“But you do not love him,” objected Frank; “if you loved him I should hate him.”
“I did love him—once.”
“A man who has failed to keep his wife’s love deserves to lose it,” said Frank glibly37, who was opening the champagne38.
“Frank, you say you love me. Suppose I said I was tired of the life I lead, that there is something in me that shrinks from deception39, that I like all the cards on the table. Would you take me away?”
The cork40 popped loudly at the moment, and he had to quickly pour some of the champagne into her glass.
“Darling, I should only be too proud. You ought to know that.”
Was it his preoccupation with the champagne, or was there something wrong with his tone or his words? What had she expected him to say? Then she pulled herself together with a laugh.
“To love is human, to marry—sometimes divine. Don’t be afraid, mon ami. I’m not cut out for those heroics, or,” she added, “you either.”
He was inwardly relieved, for a man could never be sure what a highly-strung, emotional woman like Claudia would expect of him. She was adorable, she was well-born and clever, but—no, he was not cut out for “heroics.” As much as he could be, he was desperately41 in love with her; it was perfectly42 true that the thought of her obsessed43 his days and nights. But love to him was a pleasant thing, a serious light-mindedness in which a little pretence44 was necessary on either side. They might sigh together over the impossibility of spending[280] their lives together; they might regret that they had not met before she entered into the legal compact; they might even indulge in rosy45 dreams of a future if she “ever became free,” but they would be very careful not to endanger her reputation or cause her spouse46 to set her free. Bourgeois47 born, reared among ideals of hypocritical respectability, Frank Hamilton had secretly a horror of anything outré, such as the Divorce Court. It would probably make very little difference to his career as an artist, but his innate48 conventionality revolted at the thought.
“If you would trust yourself to me, I would try and prove worthy49 of your bounty,” he said humbly50. “My dearest, you wring51 my heart by these doubts of me. Don’t you yet believe in my love?”
She was playing with the wing of a chicken.
“How can one tell love from passion? Do you know?”
“I’ll ask you a question. Do you believe that love between a young normal woman and man can exist without passion?”
His eyes challenged hers over the deep red roses. There was a little flush on her creamy cheeks now, and the primroses were fading whitely at her breast. There was a current of electricity in the little room going from him to her. She fancied she could almost hear the beating of the wings.
“No, passion must be part of love.”
“And you wouldn’t care for a man who was content merely to love you at a respectful distance? No, you needn’t answer. I know you wouldn’t. You’re much too alive for that. You are much too passionate53. A placid54, hold-my-hand love would never make you happy.... Shall we have coffee upstairs in the studio?”
She nodded. The atmosphere of the little room seemed to have become too close. She was aware that her checks were burning.
[281]
She knew that she stood on the Great Threshold. It was only fair to Frank that she should decide to-night. She knew by this time enough of men to realize that self-repression, self-control are foreign to their nature and upbringing. She was content, or she could have forced herself to be content, with the indefinite relations between them. Something urged her across the threshold, and yet something that she could not grasp or define held her back. She remembered a phrase from a play she had seen a few days previously55, in which a man had spoken of “woman’s innate purity.” Could she lay claim to such a possession? Clearly, no. She had dallied56 with the idea, she had let Frank kiss her time and again without any repugnance57. A pure-minded woman would have repulsed58 him at the outset. She would have said, “I am a married woman. Only my husband has a right to my caresses59.”
“I have forgotten the cigarettes. I’ll run down for them, if you’ll excuse me a minute.”
The Great Threshold! Her heart beat faster as she contemplated61 it. She wondered in what fashion the married women she knew had stepped across it—gaily, impulsively62, with reckless abandonment, with inward shrinking, with cool deliberation—how? La Rochefoucauld once said, “Some ladies may be met with who never had any intrigue63 at all, but it will be exceedingly hard to find any who have had one and no more,” but then, he was only a maxim-monger, and the making of maxims64, like the making of epigrams, is only a trick. If she crossed it, there would only be Frank. They would love one another secretly, and the stolen hours together would make her barren life more tolerable. Jack65 had made out that liaisons66 were nothing more than licentious67 flirtations. If two people really loved[282]——
Moved by a restless spirit, she rose and went over to the mantelpiece. Her eyes fell with a start on a visiting-card inscribed68 colin paton.
Her hands fell nervelessly to her sides. Somehow there seemed a third person in the room. Frank came back and handed her the box of cigarettes.
She indicated the card.
“Mr. Paton—has been here?... Thank you.”
“Yes. I asked him to come some time, and he came to-day. He said he wanted to see how your portrait was getting on.”
“What did he say about it?”
“I didn’t show it to him,” said Frank, with a touch of arrogance69. “Besides, it isn’t quite finished, and no artist likes to expose an unfinished picture.”
“It’s practically finished. I needn’t come any more for it?”
“We won’t tell people it’s finished,” he whispered, close to her ear. “We will pretend it is still only half-finished.”
The words jarred, and she drew away from him. Yet he was quite right. If she crossed the threshold, she must in future take refuge in such subterfuges70. She must lie to everyone, to honest Pat, to Colin Paton—— Her brows met in a frown. Could love thrive in such an atmosphere? Frank seemed to have thought the whole thing out, counted on her surrender—How dared he?—and yet—She had certainly encouraged him, there was no gainsaying71 that.
With a smile he complied, classing her with the other vain women who had sat to him. She wanted to look on her own beauty. He pulled forward the easel and took off the cloth.
It was one of the best bits of painting he had ever[283] done. He had worked hard on it, and it had but slightly the faults that usually marred73 his work. He had put in careful, conscientious74 brush-work; and in combination with the arresting individuality of the sitter, the result was one of which he might justly be proud.
But as Claudia gazed on it, dissatisfaction stirred within her. The yellowish lights—the electric globes were of some daffodil tint—made her see it as she had never done before. The eyes were surely too ardent75, the curve of the lips too sensual, the whole face had a curious voluptuousness76 that made her recoil77 from the picture. Did she give people that impression?
“Is it—exactly like me?” she asked.
“It’s as I see you,” he said complacently78. “My beautiful Claudia! It is good, isn’t it? I think it will create a sensation when it is exhibited.”
Suddenly she knew that she hated it, that she did not want the world to see it, to stare at it, to comment on it. Yes, she was glad Colin had not seen it. He might have thought——
“I don’t like it.”
If she had suddenly held a pistol at his head he could not have been more surprised. He turned from his very self-satisfied contemplation of the picture and stared at the original. And it was not the woman of the portrait he saw, nor the flushed, hesitating woman of the dinner-table, but a woman whose eyes were wide open and startled, as though some new aspect of life had struck her; a woman who was fighting for self-mastery, calling to her aid that pride and moral fastidiousness that were innate in her, and which lately she had been trying to keep out of sight.
She was not the woman, she told herself, she never would be the woman of the picture. That was not a woman with true love and passion in her eyes, it was mere52 animal sensuality. Yet she was aware that she[284] might become that woman if she crossed the threshold. Dare she take the risk? Did she want to take the risk?
“I don’t understand.”
She had never heard him speak so angrily. Yes, he was really angry. His artistic pride was wounded.
“It’s very clever, very clever,” she stammered79, “but I—I don’t like the way you have depicted80 me. It isn’t the nicest—me.”
His eyes were very light and very cold as he faced her, and suddenly they seemed to be bright and shallow, like those of a bird. His lips made a thin red line, and a hardness of the lines of the jaw81 became noticeable.
“Frank, don’t you understand?” she pleaded. “There, in the picture, you have made me an amoureuse, une grande amoureuse, and I—I don’t think I’m really that.” Then a little wildly—“It may be in me, I may have it in my blood, but I don’t want it to come out.... I’m sorry, Frank, but I don’t like it.”
She saw, as she looked in his face, that he did not understand, that she could never make him understand. She had mortally wounded his pride. He would never forgive the thrust.
Without a word he noisily pushed back the easel. Mechanically she sank down on the divan again, and as she disturbed one of the cushions, a piece of paper became uncovered. Before she realized that it might be private, her eyes had taken in the wording. It was the Bridgemans’ telegram—“Sorry wife ill. Cannot come to-morrow. Bridgeman.”
With a last kick the easel was lodged82 in its place against the wall. She put the cushion over the telegram again, as he came back to the centre of the room like a sulky child, a cigarette drooping83 at the corner of his mouth.
“You’re extremely difficult to please,” he said sarcastically84. “I’m glad all my sitters are not so particular.[285] You can’t say I haven’t done full justice to your looks.”
That was all he could make out of her explanation, her confession85! It was a shock, but it had the effect of steadying her. Her voice was very quiet and composed as she replied:
“If you don’t mind, Frank, I won’t have the picture exhibited. After all, a portrait is a personal thing. Send it home to me as soon as it is finished.” She wanted to add “and I will send you a cheque for it,” but she was afraid of hurting his feelings. Nothing had ever been said about payment. It had been tacitly assumed that it was a labour of love.
“I don’t think it’s fair to me,” he protested, still sulky, the man submerged in the artist. “It’s the best picture I have ever done. No woman can judge her own portrait. Besides, you never objected to it before.”
“I always saw it quite close at hand and in the light of day. To-night, at the end of the room, it looks different.”
“Well, commend me to women-sitters for changeability!” he exclaimed bitterly.
She put her hand on the cushion that concealed86 the telegram. He had evidently been sitting in her position when it arrived.
“Perhaps—if the Bridgemans had come—they might have liked it, and their opinion is more valuable than mine. You only heard of her illness this evening?”
Petty trickery! She had nearly lent herself to that. Afterwards—yes, circumstances might have made it necessary, but before—— It was not, and it never could have been, love on either side. Love was a bigger, finer thing than that! Perhaps too large always to be confined within a wedding-ring, but this did not of itself overleap the bounds. Only the trickster passion again![286] And passion she had proved to be a cheat, a miserable88, mean cheat, that preyed89 on the emotions and ignorance of women.
She suddenly felt very tired, and her face had gone pathetically white as she rose from the divan.
“Frank, I am sorry I have hurt your feelings. I can only say again that I admire it as a piece of painting, immensely.... Now I must go home. It is getting rather late, and I think a day in the country tires one, don’t you?”
Suddenly the man overcame the vanity of the artist. His eyes changed, and before she could stop him he had crushed her in his arms.
“Never mind about the picture ... it’s you I want and must have.... I love you to distraction90.... Claudia, you can’t hesitate any longer.... It’s Kismet, stronger than both of us.”
She knew it would only be an unseemly scuffle if she struggled, a scuffle that would abase91 her pride still further. She remained cold and lifeless in his arms, until at last he released her and looked into her face with alarm.
“Claudia, you’re not going—you shan’t go——”
“Frank,” she said clearly, but without an atom of fear in her eyes, “I apologize to you. I know I’ve what you men call ‘encouraged you.’ You have the right to be angry with me, only if you love me—don’t.... I—I thought I could.... I am very unhappy.... I didn’t know myself until to-night.... There’s something that won’t let me cross the threshold.... I’m not good, and I’m not afraid of convention, but I can’t do it.... I should wake up to hate myself. It’s as well I found out in time—for you and for me.”
“You say you’re not afraid. You are afraid,” he said.
“I said I was not afraid of convention. It’s true I am afraid of something—in myself. I thought it was an[287] easy game to play. Now I wonder how a woman can play it.... Let me go now, Frank. I’m very tired.”
“You don’t love me?”
“No ... not that way?”
Her quiet voice, her steady eyes, frightened him. He knew he was playing a losing game, and he began to bluster92.
“You would love me ... you practically promised me everything ... you’ve just amused yourself with me, like other women in your set ... you run up an account, and you don’t pay the bill ... if you were a man I should call it damned dishonourable, but as you are a woman——”
She stooped and drew forth the telegram.
“And if I were a man, what should I call this?”
The paper dropped from her hand and fluttered to the ground, where it lay between them.
“It was through love of you,” he said desperately. “You shilly-shallied ... women always have ridiculous scruples93.... I swear it was through love of you. You’ve driven me out of my wits.”
She shook her head. There was no anger on her lips, only a drooping sadness.
“I wonder if that’s all a man’s love can ever mean.... I wonder! Good-night, Frank. Let’s close this chapter—friends. There have been faults on both sides.”
She held out her hand, but he turned away and flung himself on the divan with his head in his cushions.
She waited a moment, and then she went out of the door and down the stairs that led to the living-rooms below. Surely he would see her out? Would not Mrs. Marshall think it curious that she should depart in such an odd fashion? What a ludicrous finish to the evening!
The hall below was in darkness. She could see no light from the region of the kitchen. Was that, too, part of[288] his experienced man?uvring? She shivered, and groped for the electric switch. After some time she found it. Her cloak was lying on one of the hall chairs.
Was he going to let her depart alone? How would she get a taxi? It was half past eleven. Oh! how tired she felt now. Her feet seemed leaden as she slipped the cloak round her shoulders. She cast one more glance up at the door of the studio. But it remained closed. His manners, with his hopes of her favours, had forsaken94 him. There had been something in Rhoda Carnegie’s remarks, after all.
She opened the hall-door, and found the stone stairs only very dimly lit. She went heavily down them, forgetting that she might have summoned the lift. Her soft pink dress trailed after her, for she was too tired to hold it up. How unending the stairs were! Would she ever get to the bottom? How many flights was it—six?
It seemed to her that she had been plodding95 down the stairs for ages, when suddenly a hall-door opened just as she was rounding a turn of the staircase. A voice said quietly, “I’ll come in to-morrow morning to see how he is getting on.”
She had unconsciously shrunk back against the wall among the shadows, but at the recognition of his voice she exclaimed, she thought in a whisper, “Colin!”
He stopped in the act of running down the stairs, and came back. But now she had no volition96 left to move backwards97 or forwards. He groped up the stairs, and saw the gleam of a diamond spray on her corsage. He went nearer and saw her.
“Claudia!... Claudia!” The first “Claudia” was pure astonishment98, but the second held something more, something that seemed to match the look in his eyes when he had been watching her flirting99 with Frank at her mother’s “at home.”
[289]
“Colin,” she said pitifully, “I’m so tired ... take me home ... please, take me home....”
She stumbled a little, and he quietly put her hand through his arm.
“It’s not worth summoning the lift ... it’s only two flights; lean on my arm.”
She leaned more heavily than she knew, for all her spirit had gone, her springy step had deserted100 her, her head drooped101 sideways.
Luckily there was a taxi passing, and in a few minutes she found herself beside him on the narrow seat. For a moment she sat motionless, hardly realizing his presence. Then, with a childish impulse for comfort, she put her head on his shoulder, and commenced to sob102.
“Colin, don’t think things.... I want to explain....”
His hand closed firmly over her cold one, cold, though the night was quite hot.
“Claudia, don’t ... there’s no need ... what are friends for?”
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cosy
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| adj.温暖而舒适的，安逸的 | |
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tablecloth
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petals
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scattered
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artistic
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negligence
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gnawed
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elude
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aloofness
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admiration
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phlegmatic
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jovial
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primroses
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frailty
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dame
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dignified
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cozy
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inviting
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mellow
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indifference
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clatter
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hearth
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momentary
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devoted
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deferential
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entirely
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provocatively
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32
adorn
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| vt.使美化，装饰 | |
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exquisite
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| adj.精美的；敏锐的；剧烈的，感觉强烈的 | |
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tenants
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| n.房客( tenant的名词复数 )；佃户；占用者；占有者 | |
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slain
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| 杀死，宰杀，杀戮( slay的过去分词 )； (slay的过去分词) | |
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morbidly
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| adv.病态地 | |
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glibly
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| adv.流利地，流畅地；满口 | |
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38
champagne
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| n.香槟酒；微黄色 | |
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deception
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| n.欺骗，欺诈；骗局，诡计 | |
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40
cork
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| n.软木，软木塞 | |
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41
desperately
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| adv.极度渴望地，绝望地，孤注一掷地 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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obsessed
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| adj.心神不宁的,鬼迷心窍的,沉迷的 | |
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pretence
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| n.假装，作假；借口，口实；虚伪；虚饰 | |
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rosy
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| adj.美好的，乐观的，玫瑰色的 | |
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46
spouse
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| n.配偶(指夫或妻) | |
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bourgeois
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| adj./n.追求物质享受的(人)；中产阶级分子 | |
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innate
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| adj.天生的，固有的，天赋的 | |
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worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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50
humbly
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| adv. 恭顺地，谦卑地 | |
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51
wring
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| n.扭绞；v.拧，绞出，扭 | |
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52
mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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placid
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| adj.安静的，平和的 | |
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previously
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| adv.以前，先前（地） | |
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dallied
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| v.随随便便地对待( dally的过去式和过去分词 )；不很认真地考虑；浪费时间；调情 | |
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repugnance
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| n.嫌恶 | |
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repulsed
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| v.击退( repulse的过去式和过去分词 )；驳斥；拒绝 | |
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caresses
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| 爱抚，抚摸( caress的名词复数 ) | |
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divan
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| n.长沙发；（波斯或其他东方诗人的）诗集 | |
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contemplated
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| adj. 预期的 动词contemplate的过去分词形式 | |
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impulsively
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| adv.冲动地 | |
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intrigue
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| vt.激起兴趣，迷住；vi.耍阴谋；n.阴谋，密谋 | |
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maxims
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| n.格言，座右铭( maxim的名词复数 ) | |
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jack
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| n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克 | |
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liaisons
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| n.联络( liaison的名词复数 )；联络人；（尤指一方或双方已婚的）私通；组织单位间的交流与合作 | |
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licentious
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| adj.放纵的，淫乱的 | |
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inscribed
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| v.写，刻( inscribe的过去式和过去分词 )；内接 | |
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arrogance
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| n.傲慢，自大 | |
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subterfuges
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| n.（用说谎或欺骗以逃脱责备、困难等的）花招，遁词( subterfuge的名词复数 ) | |
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gainsaying
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| v.否认，反驳( gainsay的现在分词 ) | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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marred
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| adj. 被损毁, 污损的 | |
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conscientious
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| adj.审慎正直的，认真的，本着良心的 | |
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ardent
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，强烈的，烈性的 | |
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voluptuousness
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| n.风骚，体态丰满 | |
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recoil
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| vi.退却，退缩，畏缩 | |
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complacently
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| adv. 满足地, 自满地, 沾沾自喜地 | |
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stammered
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| v.结巴地说出( stammer的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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depicted
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| 描绘，描画( depict的过去式和过去分词 )； 描述 | |
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jaw
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| n.颚，颌，说教，流言蜚语；v.喋喋不休，教训 | |
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82
lodged
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| v.存放( lodge的过去式和过去分词 )；暂住；埋入；（权利、权威等）归属 | |
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83
drooping
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| adj. 下垂的，无力的 动词droop的现在分词 | |
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84
sarcastically
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| adv.挖苦地，讽刺地 | |
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85
confession
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| n.自白，供认，承认 | |
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86
concealed
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| a.隐藏的，隐蔽的 | |
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87
moodily
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| adv.喜怒无常地；情绪多变地；心情不稳地；易生气地 | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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preyed
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| v.掠食( prey的过去式和过去分词 )；掠食；折磨；（人）靠欺诈为生 | |
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distraction
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| n.精神涣散，精神不集中，消遣，娱乐 | |
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abase
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| v.降低，贬抑 | |
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92
bluster
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| v.猛刮；怒冲冲的说；n.吓唬，怒号；狂风声 | |
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scruples
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| n.良心上的不安( scruple的名词复数 )；顾虑，顾忌v.感到于心不安，有顾忌( scruple的第三人称单数 ) | |
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Forsaken
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| adj. 被遗忘的, 被抛弃的 动词forsake的过去分词 | |
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95
plodding
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| a.proceeding in a slow or dull way | |
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96
volition
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| n.意志；决意 | |
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97
backwards
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| adv.往回地，向原处，倒，相反，前后倒置地 | |
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98
astonishment
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| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
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99
flirting
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| v.调情，打情骂俏( flirt的现在分词 ) | |
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100
deserted
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| adj.荒芜的，荒废的，无人的，被遗弃的 | |
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101
drooped
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| 弯曲或下垂，发蔫( droop的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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102
sob
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| n.空间轨道的轰炸机；呜咽，哭泣 | |
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