“’Tis quickly seen,
Whate’er he be, ’twas not what he had been;
...
“Chained to excess, the slave of each extreme,
How woke he from the wildness of his dream?
—“Lara.”
The course of the knights7 fleeing from Acre was turned toward Nazareth. There being but one way open to them, they took that way quickly and with one accord. The fugitives8 from Acre represented various knightly9 orders, but they were disorganized, without any definite destination and without an authorized10 leader. Among them was Sir Charleroy de Griffin, a knight famed for valor11, a central and commanding personage; one that would have attracted attention in almost any assembly of men. As he went, so went the rest of the fleeing Christians12, and when he reined13 in his panting steed,[54] after a time, at the top of a fir-crested knoll14 not far from Nazareth, the knights following him did likewise. Then they drew around him in a semi-circle, without command, and simultaneously15, as if to solicit16 his direction. They had followed the course he took because he took it, and now with one accord they halted because he had done so. There is to some a subtile influence that makes them leaders of men; so the disorganized Crusaders, by an unvoiced but fully17 expressed concession18, admitted the leadership of this dashing horseman. Some may designate this a triumph of personal magnetism19, but be that as it may, it was a fact that Sir Charleroy was chief. Sir Charleroy, just at the time of the foregoing incident, presented an admirable study for the philosopher or painter. From his saddle he was able to overlook leagues of bright landscape, but he could not claim the protection of a foot of it; for the first time in his life he yearned20 for home, now a spreading sea, and a wall of death shut it out from him apparently21 for ever; by circumstances absolute sovereign almost of the men about him, but doubt and danger were confounding all his ability to give commands. He fell into a train of thought, leaving his comrades to converse22 with their pawing steeds and to questionings within themselves as to the future. Sir Charleroy had reached an eminence23 in life, one of those points of out-look where a man’s past meets him and demands review, that it may explain the present. He believed that he had reached very nearly the end of his career, and in that belief he began to weigh it for what it was worth. In imagination he saw one writing the story of his life.[55] Sir Charleroy, the refugee, began faithfully to review Sir Charleroy, the wayward youth, pleasure-seeker and reckless man. The former dictated24 mentally to the imaginary scribe: “Write, Charleroy de Griffin was the son of a stalwart French Baron25, used to duels26 and trained to war. The boy inherited from his father a splendid physique, of which he was unduly27 proud, and a restless disposition28 that he never sincerely asked God to control. By the death of the baron, his son, an infant, was left to the sole tutelage of his English mother. The latter was of high birth, by nature a noble woman, and in every way worthy29 of a better son than the one whom he had turned out to be. She had idolized her brawny31 spouse32 in his lifetime, and when she had recovered from the shock his death caused, her yearning33 heart, little by little, turned from the idol30 in the tomb to the child he had left her. Ere long she lived again in the rapture34 of a love all absorbing, all bestowing35, all ruling. She lavished36 her affection on the youth, not because he was particularly lovable, for he was not, but because he was the only one left her to love, and she was so constituted that she must love; the necessity of loving to her made it easy.
“Then there were many things in the features and form of her son that reminded her of the man who, in brighter days, had won entirely37 her maiden38 heart and her young wife love. The child was wont39 to wonder why his mother embraced him as she did sometimes, with a wondering, startled, wild, passionate40 embrace; but when he got older he discerned the meaning of these outbreaks. He knew that the mother-heart was having a vision of past wifehood, memory’s grace-given[56] solace41 of widowhood. Besides this the embraces were her appealings or warnings to death; her heart suddenly seizing as if to shelter and save her last and only idol; for the thought would sometimes come with shadows deep enough, that perhaps the boy might also die. Such love would have been a prized wealth and blessing42 to some; but in this case, on the one hand, it unfitted this mother for the proper disciplining of this son, and this son though, sometimes, when his conceit43 permitted it, realizing that the love was given, not won, began to expect it as his due or despise it for its lavishness44. In due time he entered the period expressively45 designated, ‘The monster age.’ This is the time when expanding young life has outgrown46 the tenderness of infancy47 and failed of putting on manly48 and womanly graces; a time when there is a mighty49 ambition to put on the characteristics of adult life and a mighty lack of ability gracefully50 to wear them. At this period, perhaps, the majority of youths of both sexes, are interesting chiefly for what they have been, or what it is hoped they will be. They feel, conscious of their growing powers, great self-conceit, and with their growth comes an expansion of their capacities and wants. The plenitude of their wantings makes them avaricious51, hence parsimonious52 toward others of every thing, especially of gratitude53. Reverence54 for elders, respect for fathers, holy regard for mothers, tenderness toward women, chief charms of youth, are buried in the tomb of other virtues55 by great, selfish, ugly demons57 of desire. The monster age came to Charleroy in its full virulence58, but his mother discerned little of his monstrosity; what she did discern, all unasked, she condoned59. She[57] believed all things, hoped all things good of him, although seldom comforted by an expression or act of gratitude on his part. She was to be pitied; but it may be said that the lad was to be pitied almost as much as herself. It was the old story over; she unconsciously went about destroying her own happiness and though she would have willingly died if need be in his behalf, she harmed him beyond estimate by her indulgent loving. Then the youth was surrounded by those who sought the favor of the baroness60 by constantly sounding in her ears, and in the ears of the boy, praises of the dead baron. They told of his daring, they descanted upon his adventures, his powers, his wisdom. He was the widow’s idol, and the incense61 was grateful to her, but the worst of it was that they befooled the lad by continually assuring him that he was the image of his father, and surely destined62 to equal, if not surpass, his sire in deeds of valor. A dangerous burden is wealth; whether it come as great name or great intellect, great physical strength or as much gold, it is a fateful load which few can gracefully support. The youth had wealth in all the foregoing directions; if he had had a mother whose love loved wisely enough to save, if it need be by pain, he might have been saved; but her love infatuated her. The youth’s folly63 brought him frequently into shameful64 entanglements65; but she extricated66 him each time. Nobody ever heard of her even rebuking67 him; as to chastising68 him, that were a thing abhorrent69 to her thoughts. His face always bespoke70 his pardon in advance with her. She would have smitten71 her husband’s corpse72, as it lay in its coffin73, as soon as she would have smitten the one[58] whose features constantly reminded her of him her heart had held most dear. Then she hoped, with a mother’s large-hearted faith, that each escapade would be the last. But as the youth grew older his acts were bolder. Again and again, without notice and with heartless inconsiderateness, he left his home to pursue some adventure, and again and again, mother’s love followed him, ever to find him at last in some sore plight74, and then quickly to forgive him. By the time Charleroy had reached his majority, the family fortune had been severely75 tried and depleted76 in paying the penalty of his follies77. He himself had become an old young man, with too many gray hairs and too much experience for one of his years.
“At that time, a few enthusiasts78 having determined79 to make one last effort to secure the Holy Sepulcher80, Charleroy de Griffin ardently81 enlisted82 in the pre-doomed enterprise, allured83 largely by its very desperateness. The crusade spirit was then a fitful dying flame throughout Europe. England and France were left practically alone to furnish the men and the money for the last crusade. Prince Edward of France was its leader, and De Griffin, having in his veins84 the blood of both of the supporting nations, a French name, a splendid physique, together with a fearless, dashing temperament85, was enthusiastically hailed to the enlistment86 and pushed forward to leadership. ‘Sir Charleroy de Griffin!’ smilingly called out Prince Edward, the day of review, before the one set for departure. The young man’s comrades, many of whom had been his associates in former days of wassail, hearing the Prince’s word, shouted out with one accord, ‘Knighted![59] The prince has knighted de Griffin! Hurrah87 for Sir Charleroy!’ The day following Sir Charleroy bowed his head, as he stood on the quay88 ready to embark89, to receive the benediction90 of a bishop91. As the sacrist laid his hands on the young man’s head, the latter, throwing back his cloak, reverently92 touched the cross he had attached to his bosom93 with his jeweled sword-hilt. The young knight for a little while was very complacent94; for he was enjoying a sentimental95 emotion of virtue56, arising from sophistries96 with which his mind toyed. Some way he felt he had become a soldier of the holy Christ, and somehow it seemed to him he was making atonement for past follies by now placing himself side by side with the pious97 and noble. Though in reality only bent98 on seeking excitement, adventure, change, he looked forward to the rewards of conscience belonging alone to the penitent99, and to a possible public canonizing as one going forth100 to die for God. A little piety101 paralleling one’s own desires is often made to do great service in silencing the clamors from within. His proud, tearful mother was by his side. Passionately102 she kissed his cross, then his brow, then his eyes and then his lips; leaving on the brow the glistening103, dewy jewels that told the story of the heart which bade him stay, yet go. The young knight was for once in his life very serious, but tearless. After all this, in rapid steps, followed the disaster at Acre; the desperate struggle outside the city; the flight toward Nazareth. Sir Charleroy finally stands between the sea and the city, a mother’s idol ready to be broken; at twenty-five, near the apparent apex104 and end of a life, having had great opportunities,[60] now, with all lost, he stands there an epitome105 of paradoxes106. He had made life a pursuit of pleasure only to find the pursuit ending in misery107; he had enlisted to serve the Prince of Peace, but that service he had undertaken with the sword; he had championed, as he said, the cause of Christ, the all-conquering, but he meets utter defeat. He had taken for his patron saint Mary, after years of libertinism108. He elected Mary, he said, because his mother was so like her. But Sir Charleroy’s mother demoralized her son by over-indulgence, while Mary, though informed by Gabriel that her offspring was divine, followed her child as a true mother, with the divinely appointed authority of a mother, serenely109, constantly directing his career up to the feast of Jerusalem, where he began to reveal his divine commission. Even then, motherhood affirmed its rights in the very presence of God manifest, in the question: ‘Son, why hast thou dealt thus?’ Nor was the right challenged, for ‘he went down and was subject to’ father and mother!” At this point Sir Charleroy ceased mentally tracing his own career, and lifting his eyes looked intently toward Nazareth. “Ah,” he said, but so that none could hear his words, “my mother loved as many another, in part selfishly, for the joy of abandoned love, and I squander110 that patrimony111 like a spendthrift, to my harm. Mary’s love for her son was like his for the world, a constant self-abnegation. That love survives as an inspiration to the world. By these contrasts I explain my failure in life, and the present is the natural sequence of the past.”
By Murillo.
THE BIRTH OF MARY.
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knight
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| n.骑士，武士；爵士 | |
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furrowed
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| v.犁田，开沟( furrow的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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alas
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| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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withered
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| adj. 枯萎的，干瘪的，（人身体的部分器官）因病萎缩的或未发育良好的 动词wither的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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knights
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| 骑士； （中古时代的）武士( knight的名词复数 )； 骑士； 爵士； （国际象棋中）马 | |
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fugitives
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| n.亡命者，逃命者( fugitive的名词复数 ) | |
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knightly
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| adj. 骑士般的 adv. 骑士般地 | |
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authorized
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| a.委任的，许可的 | |
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valor
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| n.勇气，英勇 | |
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Christians
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| n.基督教徒( Christian的名词复数 ) | |
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reined
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| 勒缰绳使（马）停步( rein的过去式和过去分词 )； 驾驭； 严格控制； 加强管理 | |
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knoll
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| n.小山，小丘 | |
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simultaneously
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| adv.同时发生地，同时进行地 | |
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solicit
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| vi.勾引；乞求；vt.请求，乞求；招揽(生意) | |
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fully
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| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
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concession
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| n.让步，妥协；特许(权) | |
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magnetism
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| n.磁性，吸引力，磁学 | |
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yearned
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| 渴望，切盼，向往( yearn的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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converse
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| vi.谈话，谈天，闲聊；adv.相反的，相反 | |
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eminence
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| n.卓越，显赫；高地，高处；名家 | |
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dictated
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| v.大声讲或读( dictate的过去式和过去分词 )；口授；支配；摆布 | |
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baron
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| n.男爵；(商业界等)巨头，大王 | |
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duels
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| n.两男子的决斗( duel的名词复数 )；竞争，斗争 | |
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unduly
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| adv.过度地，不适当地 | |
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disposition
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| n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署 | |
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worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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idol
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| n.偶像，红人，宠儿 | |
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brawny
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| adj.强壮的 | |
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spouse
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| n.配偶(指夫或妻) | |
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yearning
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| a.渴望的；向往的；怀念的 | |
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rapture
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| n.狂喜；全神贯注；着迷；v.使狂喜 | |
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bestowing
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| 砖窑中砖堆上层已烧透的砖 | |
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lavished
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| v.过分给予，滥施( lavish的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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maiden
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| n.少女，处女；adj.未婚的，纯洁的，无经验的 | |
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wont
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| adj.习惯于；v.习惯；n.习惯 | |
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passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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solace
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| n.安慰；v.使快乐；vt.安慰(物)，缓和 | |
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blessing
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| n.祈神赐福；祷告；祝福，祝愿 | |
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conceit
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| n.自负，自高自大 | |
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lavishness
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| n.浪费，过度 | |
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expressively
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| ad.表示(某事物)地；表达地 | |
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46
outgrown
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| 长[发展] 得超过（某物）的范围( outgrow的过去分词 )； 长[发展]得不能再要（某物）； 长得比…快； 生长速度超过 | |
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infancy
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| n.婴儿期；幼年期；初期 | |
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manly
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| adj.有男子气概的；adv.男子般地，果断地 | |
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mighty
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| adj.强有力的；巨大的 | |
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gracefully
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| ad.大大方方地；优美地 | |
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avaricious
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| adj.贪婪的，贪心的 | |
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parsimonious
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| adj.吝啬的，质量低劣的 | |
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gratitude
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| adj.感激，感谢 | |
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reverence
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| n.敬畏，尊敬，尊严；Reverence:对某些基督教神职人员的尊称；v.尊敬，敬畏，崇敬 | |
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virtues
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| 美德( virtue的名词复数 )； 德行； 优点； 长处 | |
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virtue
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| n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力 | |
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demons
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| n.恶人( demon的名词复数 )；恶魔；精力过人的人；邪念 | |
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virulence
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| n.毒力，毒性；病毒性；致病力 | |
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condoned
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| v.容忍，宽恕，原谅( condone的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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baroness
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| n.男爵夫人，女男爵 | |
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incense
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| v.激怒；n.香，焚香时的烟，香气 | |
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destined
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| adj.命中注定的；(for)以…为目的地的 | |
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folly
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| n.愚笨，愚蠢，蠢事，蠢行，傻话 | |
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shameful
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| adj.可耻的，不道德的 | |
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entanglements
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| n.瓜葛( entanglement的名词复数 )；牵连；纠缠；缠住 | |
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extricated
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| v.使摆脱困难，脱身( extricate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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rebuking
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| 责难或指责( rebuke的现在分词 ) | |
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chastising
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| v.严惩（某人）（尤指责打）( chastise的现在分词 ) | |
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abhorrent
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| adj.可恶的，可恨的，讨厌的 | |
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bespoke
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| adj.（产品）订做的；专做订货的v.预定( bespeak的过去式 )；订（货）；证明；预先请求 | |
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smitten
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| 猛打，重击，打击( smite的过去分词 ) | |
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corpse
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| n.尸体，死尸 | |
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coffin
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| n.棺材，灵柩 | |
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plight
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| n.困境，境况，誓约，艰难；vt.宣誓，保证，约定 | |
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severely
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| adv.严格地；严厉地；非常恶劣地 | |
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depleted
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| adj. 枯竭的, 废弃的 动词deplete的过去式和过去分词 | |
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follies
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| 罪恶，时事讽刺剧； 愚蠢，蠢笨，愚蠢的行为、思想或做法( folly的名词复数 ) | |
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enthusiasts
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| n.热心人，热衷者( enthusiast的名词复数 ) | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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sepulcher
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| n.坟墓 | |
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81
ardently
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| adv.热心地，热烈地 | |
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82
enlisted
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| adj.应募入伍的v.（使）入伍， （使）参军( enlist的过去式和过去分词 )；获得（帮助或支持） | |
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83
allured
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| 诱引，吸引( allure的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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84
veins
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| n.纹理；矿脉( vein的名词复数 )；静脉；叶脉；纹理 | |
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85
temperament
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| n.气质，性格，性情 | |
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86
enlistment
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| n.应征入伍，获得，取得 | |
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87
hurrah
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| int.好哇，万岁，乌拉 | |
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88
quay
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| n.码头，靠岸处 | |
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89
embark
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| vi.乘船，着手，从事，上飞机 | |
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90
benediction
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| n.祝福；恩赐 | |
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91
bishop
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| n.主教，（国际象棋）象 | |
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92
reverently
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| adv.虔诚地 | |
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93
bosom
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| n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的 | |
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94
complacent
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| adj.自满的；自鸣得意的 | |
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95
sentimental
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| adj.多愁善感的，感伤的 | |
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96
sophistries
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| n.诡辩术( sophistry的名词复数 )；（一次）诡辩 | |
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97
pious
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| adj.虔诚的；道貌岸然的 | |
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98
bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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99
penitent
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| adj.后悔的；n.后悔者；忏悔者 | |
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100
forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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101
piety
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| n.虔诚，虔敬 | |
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102
passionately
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| ad.热烈地，激烈地 | |
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103
glistening
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| adj.闪耀的，反光的v.湿物闪耀，闪亮( glisten的现在分词 ) | |
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104
apex
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| n.顶点，最高点 | |
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105
epitome
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| n.典型，梗概 | |
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106
paradoxes
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| n.似非而是的隽语，看似矛盾而实际却可能正确的说法( paradox的名词复数 )；用于语言文学中的上述隽语；有矛盾特点的人[事物，情况] | |
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107
misery
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| n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦 | |
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108
libertinism
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| n.放荡，玩乐，（对宗教事物的）自由思想 | |
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109
serenely
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| adv.安详地，宁静地，平静地 | |
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110
squander
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| v.浪费，挥霍 | |
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111
patrimony
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| n.世袭财产，继承物 | |
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