“We shore knocked de skin offen Pap Curtain’s nose to-night, Figger,” Butts2 exulted3. “Dat’s de way so keep on. We’ll show dat ole man dat he cain’t beat us at dis game.”
“Never no more fer me, Skeeter,” Figger said earnestly. “I got to repent4 an’ refawm an’ dodge5 brickbats. Atter you dances one time wid a ole sook-cow like Solly, ’tain’t no trouble to repent an’ refawm. But I’s shore much ableeged fer dis cigareet holder6. I been needin’ one fer a long time.”
“You gimme dat cigareet holder back,” Skeeter snapped. “Us kin1 use it fer all de yuther prizes, an’ I proposes to git my money back by smokin’ it myself.”
“I knowed you warn’t gwine be lib’ral wid yo’ gifts,” Figger said, as he reluctantly produced the holder and passed it to Skeeter. “I oughter lost dat prize befo’ I showed up here.”
“You kin git de good outen it by watchin’ me smoke it,” Skeeter snickered. “An’ ef we bust7 Pap’s plans about startin’ a saloon, mebbe I’ll let you smoke it a few times to keep yo’ feelin’s from gittin’ hurt.”
At that moment the door of the saloon opened and old Isaiah Gaitskill came across the room to where the two men sat at a table. Isaiah was one of the landmarks8 of Tickfall, withered9 and wrinkled and dry like the hull10 of a walnut11, his gray hair fitting his head like a rubber cap, over eighty years of age, but as hard and active as a soldier.
“Ole fellers like you oughter be in bed, Isaiah,” Skeeter announced as he waved the visitor to a chair.
“Fellers nearly as ole as me is not only stayin’ up late but dey is figgerin’ ’bout gittin’ married,” Isaiah replied with a grin.
“Pap Curtain ain’t nigh as old as you,” Figger retorted.
“’Tain’t Pap I’s alludin’ to,” Isaiah answered. “It’s brudder Popsy Spout12 whut’s studyin’ mattermony.”
Many things had happened to those two young men in their variegated13 and adventurous14 careers, but nothing had ever happened to produce such a shock as Isaiah’s announcement. Figger uttered a startled exclamation15, started to rise from his seat, then sank back with his chin in his collar and collapsed16 like a punctured17 tire. Skeeter Butts pawed the air in front of his face with both hands as if fighting off invisible insects; he made inarticulate noises in his throat, shut his teeth down so hard on his celluloid nickel-plated cigarette holder that he split it for two inches, and then exclaimed despairingly:
The sound was like the feeble exhaust of an automobile19 that is utterly20 worn out and broken down and never intends to be serviceable again.
“I come aroun’ to ax you-alls is Popsy still got dat thousan’ dollars in Marse Tom Gaitskill’s bank,” Isaiah proceeded, taking no notice of the terrible effect of his announcement.
“Whoosh!” Skeeter sighed again.
“I got a notion dat Popsy’s suttinly still got it,” Isaiah continued. “Dat ole monkey don’t spen’ no money—he saves it.”
“Whoosh!” Skeeter muttered.
There was a long silence, the men looking at each other without a word. After a while Isaiah began to drum on the table with his horny fingernails, and the sound was as annoying and as startling in the stillness as the rat-a-tat-tat of a woodpecker trying to drill a hole through a tin roof. Slowly Figger recovered his power of speech. He glared at Skeeter uttering one intelligible22 sentence:
“You is to blame fer dis!”
And then he began to “cuss.” It was an edifying23 exhibition to one interested in the use of forcible words, interested in the efficiency attained24 through long practice and experience, and interested in knowing how copious25 is the English language in terms of profanity, blasphemy26, and execration27.
Isaiah listened, casting a glance of admiration28 toward Figger now and then as he heard some especially pregnant phrases of vituperation, then he said:
“Save a few cuss-words fer future use, Figger. You’ll need ’em.”
“Keep on, Figger,” Skeeter said encouragingly. “Dis here is a cussin’ case an’ you ain’t done de case justice even yit.”
“I ain’t gwine stay here an’ listen,” Isaiah snapped. “I jes’ stopped by to ax about Popsy’s finances. Ef he’s still got de dough29 he had when he arrived up at dis town, he’s got twicet as much as de gal30 he’s studin’ to marry an’ dat’ll make a good match.”
“I ain’t specified,” Isaiah grinned, reaching for his hat and preparing to go. “But I don’t mind tellin’—it’s my stepchile by my fourth wife’s fust marriage, Mrs. Solly Skaggs!”
The exclamation which Figger uttered at this information indicated that he had exhausted32 all the treasuries33 of speech: language could go no further.
“I tole you to save some cuss-words,” Isaiah grinned.
“Dar won’t be enough room in Popsy’s little cabin fer Figger an’ his wife an’ Popsy an’ his wife,” he meditated35 aloud. “Solly is a cabin-full all by herse’f.”
“Popsy is shore gittin’ plenty fer his money,” Isaiah chuckled36. “I’s glad she’s ended up dat way. Dat fat gal kin eat as much as fo’teen chillun an’ a cow an’ a calf37. I don’t hanker to suppote her.”
“How come Popsy made up his mind to ack a fool so suddent?” Skeeter wailed.
“He seen Figger dancin’ wid Solly an’ he don’t approve of dat exoncise. He’s marryin’ Solly to refawm her an’ to git him a new housekeeper38 because he’s gwine chase Figger an’ Scootie outen his cabin fer deceivin’ him.”
Sometimes when you step on the shell of a dead turtle it makes a ridiculous squeak39. Figger made a noise like that.
“Bad luck, Figger,” Skeeter said sympathetically, as he took the broken nickel-plated cigarette holder from his mouth and handed it to Figger. “I gives you dis little present to show my sad feelin’s todes you.”
Figger’s mental perturbation was such that he stuck it in his mouth, struck a match and tried to light it without placing a cigarette on the end.
“Dis is awful,” he sighed.
“I reckin Popsy is expeckin’ me back about now,” Isaiah remarked as he arose. “As Solly’s nachel gardeen, he axed me to speak up to Solly an’ find out ef she wus willin’. But fust I come to see how Popsy wus fixed40 financial. Solly ain’t hankerin’ to take in no white folks’ washin’s to suppote a ole gizzard like Popsy.”
“Whar is Popsy now?” Skeeter asked eagerly.
“He’s at Shin Bone’s resterant here in town,” Isaiah replied.
“Us will go wid you, Isaiah!” Skeeter exclaimed. “Ef dar’s a weddin’ plannin’ I wants to he’p it along.”
The three men hurried to the eating-house as rapidly as Figger’s feeble knees could carry him. Skeeter had to support his friend by holding his arm, for all Figger’s vital force was gone. They found Popsy the only patron of the place and he was using a long table in the middle of the room, not for the consumption of food, but for a bed! He was stretched out full length on the table, his arm under his head for a pillow, his rusty41 stove-pipe hat placed beside him.
“Dis here bridegroom is takin’ a nap,” Skeeter snickered, as he walked in and sat down at the table beside the sleeping man. The others saw no reason to arouse him from his slumbers42, so they sat down beside him and looked at the sleeper43. Skeeter walked to another table, picked up a stalk of celery and brought it back and placed it in Popsy’s hand where it rested upon his breast.
Taking off his hat, he placed it with exaggerated solemnity over his heart and sighed with pitiable sadness:
“Don’t he look nachel? Ain’t dat a sweet smile on his face? He looks jes’ like I seed him yistiddy—ain’t changed a bit!”
He walked over to Figger, leaned down, and whispered:
“Wus you acquainted wid de corp’?”
“I knowed him real good,” Figger answered, glaring at the prostrate44 form. “He shore wus a devilish ole cranky nigger.”
“When does de fun’ral orgies take place?” Skeeter whispered. “Is de Revun Vinegar Atts gwine ’fishiate at de ’terment? Po’ ole man—atter all his troubles, he is at rest!”
A slovenly46 waitress approached the whispering men, yawned prodigiously47, and gazed at Popsy with a stupid face.
“I wants you-alls to wake up Popsy an’ tote him off home to bed. Dis here ain’t no nursery. I’s sleepy an’ it’s time to shet up dis house.”
Pap Curtain, on his way home from Coon Island, saw the men gathered around Popsy and entered.
“Naw,” Skeeter snapped. “No such good luck. Mebbe ef he sleeped here till mawnin’ he’d roll off dis table an’ break his fool neck!”
“He’s love-sick,” old Isaiah cackled. “He gittin’ ready to marry.”
“Shore!” Pap snarled48. “He tripped up my legs an’ throwed me down. I wus in hopes Popsy wus sick—less shove him off dis table an’ kill him!”
Then another man entered the restaurant. He was a fat, pot-bellied negro, his head bald except for two tufts of hair growing over his ears which made him look like a big fat-faced mule49 wearing a blind bridle50.
“Hello, brudders!” the Rev45. Vinegar Atts bellowed51. “How come you-alls didn’t stay at de weddin’?”
“Never heard tell about dat’n,” Skeeter exclaimed. “Who is de victims?”
“Brudder Wash Jones an’ Sister Solly Skaggs!”
“Whoo-pee-ee!” Figger Bush screamed. “De Lawd wus shorely wid me. Wash is done saved my life!”
Figger’s wild yell of exultation52 aroused Popsy from his slumbers. He sat up and rubbed his eyes. Then he saw Isaiah Gaitskill.
“I done decided53 not to marry Solly, Brudder Isaiah,” he whined54. “I tuck a little nap an’ I dreamt a dream dat Calline, my fust wife, come to me an’ warned me to beware of widders. She said dey wus awful treach’rous an’ deceivin’.”
“Wash an’ Solly had dat case fixed up in N’ Awleens,” Vinegar told them. “Solly wouldn’t marry Wash onless he had de same amount of money dat she inherited from her husbunt. So Wash arrived in Tickfall, started a Coon Island like N’ Yawk has, collected five hundred admissions at one dollar per each, married Solly an’ lit out on de midnight train.”
“Whut becomes of dat Coon Island?” Pap asked.
“Wash axed me to hand dat whole shebang over to you fer a consolation56 prize,” Vinegar answered.
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收听单词发音
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1
kin
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| n.家族，亲属，血缘关系；adj.亲属关系的，同类的 | |
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2
butts
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| 笑柄( butt的名词复数 )； （武器或工具的）粗大的一端； 屁股； 烟蒂 | |
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3
exulted
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| 狂喜，欢跃( exult的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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4
repent
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| v.悔悟，悔改，忏悔，后悔 | |
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5
dodge
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| v.闪开，躲开，避开；n.妙计，诡计 | |
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holder
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| n.持有者，占有者；(台，架等)支持物 | |
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7
bust
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| vt.打破；vi.爆裂；n.半身像；胸部 | |
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8
landmarks
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| n.陆标( landmark的名词复数 )；目标；（标志重要阶段的）里程碑 ~ (in sth)；有历史意义的建筑物（或遗址） | |
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9
withered
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| adj. 枯萎的，干瘪的，（人身体的部分器官）因病萎缩的或未发育良好的 动词wither的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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10
hull
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| n.船身；(果、实等的)外壳；vt.去(谷物等)壳 | |
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11
walnut
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| n.胡桃，胡桃木，胡桃色，茶色 | |
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12
spout
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| v.喷出，涌出；滔滔不绝地讲；n.喷管；水柱 | |
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13
variegated
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| adj.斑驳的，杂色的 | |
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14
adventurous
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| adj.爱冒险的；惊心动魄的，惊险的，刺激的 | |
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15
exclamation
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| n.感叹号，惊呼，惊叹词 | |
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16
collapsed
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| adj.倒塌的 | |
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17
punctured
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| v.在（某物）上穿孔( puncture的过去式和过去分词 )；刺穿（某物）；削弱（某人的傲气、信心等）；泄某人的气 | |
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18
whoosh
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| v.飞快地移动，呼 | |
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automobile
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| n.汽车，机动车 | |
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20
utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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21
ails
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| v.生病( ail的第三人称单数 )；感到不舒服；处境困难；境况不佳 | |
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22
intelligible
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| adj.可理解的，明白易懂的，清楚的 | |
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23
edifying
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| adj.有教训意味的，教训性的，有益的v.开导，启发( edify的现在分词 ) | |
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24
attained
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| （通常经过努力）实现( attain的过去式和过去分词 )； 达到； 获得； 达到（某年龄、水平、状况） | |
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25
copious
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| adj.丰富的，大量的 | |
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26
blasphemy
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| n.亵渎，渎神 | |
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27
execration
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| n.诅咒，念咒，憎恶 | |
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28
admiration
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| n.钦佩，赞美，羡慕 | |
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29
dough
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| n.生面团；钱，现款 | |
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30
gal
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| n.姑娘，少女 | |
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31
wailed
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| v.哭叫，哀号( wail的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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32
exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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33
treasuries
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| n.（政府的）财政部( treasury的名词复数 )；国库，金库 | |
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34
groaned
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| v.呻吟( groan的过去式和过去分词 )；发牢骚；抱怨；受苦 | |
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35
meditated
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| 深思，沉思，冥想( meditate的过去式和过去分词 )； 内心策划，考虑 | |
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36
chuckled
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| 轻声地笑( chuckle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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37
calf
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| n.小牛，犊，幼仔，小牛皮 | |
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38
housekeeper
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| n.管理家务的主妇，女管家 | |
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39
squeak
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| n.吱吱声，逃脱；v.（发出）吱吱叫，侥幸通过；（俚）告密 | |
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40
fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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41
rusty
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| adj.生锈的；锈色的；荒废了的 | |
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42
slumbers
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| 睡眠，安眠( slumber的名词复数 ) | |
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43
sleeper
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| n.睡眠者，卧车，卧铺 | |
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44
prostrate
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| v.拜倒，平卧，衰竭；adj.拜倒的，平卧的，衰竭的 | |
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45
rev
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| v.发动机旋转，加快速度 | |
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46
slovenly
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| adj.懒散的，不整齐的，邋遢的 | |
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47
prodigiously
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| adv.异常地，惊人地，巨大地 | |
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48
snarled
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| v.（指狗）吠，嗥叫， （人）咆哮( snarl的过去式和过去分词 )；咆哮着说，厉声地说 | |
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49
mule
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| n.骡子，杂种，执拗的人 | |
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50
bridle
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| n.笼头，束缚；vt.抑制，约束；动怒 | |
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51
bellowed
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| v.发出吼叫声，咆哮（尤指因痛苦）( bellow的过去式和过去分词 )；（愤怒地）说出（某事），大叫 | |
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52
exultation
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| n.狂喜，得意 | |
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53
decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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54
whined
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| v.哀号( whine的过去式和过去分词 )；哀诉，诉怨 | |
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55
snipped
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| v.剪( snip的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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56
consolation
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| n.安慰，慰问 | |
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