The devil a saint would be."
The only consolation1 that Master Jack2 could conjure3 up, as he carried his broken arm home, was that his father would undoubtedly4 consider the disaster a sufficient punishment for the offense5. Jack could not at first imagine why his arm should indulge in such sudden and terrible twinges and object so nervously6 to being rubbed or held. The pain which it experienced from the shaking consequent upon running caused Jack to subside7 into a walk as soon as he had assured himself that he was not followed; even then the pain gave no indication of subsiding8. Suddenly the truth dawned upon the boy's mind, and between the shock occasioned by the discovery and the sense of at least a month of vacation to be utterly9 lost, Jack became so weak and faint that when he at last reached home he dropped upon the office step and his head fell heavily against the door. The doctor, who fortunately was at home, opened hastily and exclaimed,
"Well, what's the latest?"
"Oh, father," gasped10 Jack, "I've tumbled, and I'm afraid my arm is broken."
The doctor helped the boy into a chair, eliciting11 a howl as he did so. A short examination of the arm caused additional howling, and during the quarter hour consumed by the operation of setting, Jack abandoned all preconceived ideas of the nature of fun. Finally, when the doctor carefully removed his clothing, put him into bed, and told him he would have to lie there for at least a fortnight, Jack dragged the pillow up to his face with his unhurt arm, and moistened it most uncomfortably with tears. Half an hour later, when his father had broken the news to his mother, who had nerves, and the lady came up to see him, she found him sobbing12 violently.
"Jack, Jack," she exclaimed, "this will never do. There is always a fever with arms broken above the elbow, and if you excite yourself it will come on too soon, and it may destroy your reason."
"I wish it would," sobbed13 Jack, "I'd a great deal rather be crazy than lie here in my senses all through this jolly, awful month. I can't pick a blackberry, and I can't have any money for Christmas, and I know Frank Parker guesses one of the new baits I was going to try on the perch14, and it'll be just like him to go and catch every one of them. It's just horrid15."
"Jack!" remonstrated16 Mrs. Wittingham, "can't you think how horrid it is for you to go and break your arm, and make more work for every body in the house?"
"Yes," said Jack, "but you don't think that makes me feel any better, do you?"
"Then," said Mrs. Wittingham, "you should take your suffering as a judgment17 from the Lord."
"He might have put it off until after vacation, anyhow," exclaimed the bad boy, at which Mrs. Wittingham clapped her fingers to her ears and fled, and informed her husband in almost the same breath, that the dreadful boy deserved a sound whipping even now, and that nothing but the grace of God could ever make Jack what he should be.
But after Jack had recovered from his rage, and had been surprised into taking a short nap, he began to view the situation in about the light which his mother would have liked him to use. It certainly had been great fun to tease that French teacher—the thought of it provoked even now a merry chuckle18 which a twinge of the arm suddenly discouraged—but it was equally certain that the teacher himself did not seem to enjoy it. As for sliding down a bell rope, no boy had ever done it before, to Jack's knowledge, but oh, how his hands were smarting! The more he thought of them the worse they burned; he must have something cooling put upon them, even if he had to confess how he came by them. Some one would be sure to tell his father of his exploits at the schoolhouse, so why shouldn't he confess in advance and get the credit for it?
May be the broken arm was a judgment upon him, as his mother suggested. Well, he would admit that he deserved it, though he still doubted the necessity for its infliction19 at this particular season of the year. He would do his best to learn by it, anyhow—he certainly was going to have time enough in which he could do nothing else. So Jack confessed, and had his hands treated to a cooling lotion20. The doctor, having previously21 heard the story from the vivacious22 tongue of the outraged23 exile himself, and having spent a delightful24 hour, partly retrospective, in laughing over the latest capers25 of his son, was in a position to listen with judicial26 gravity and to express his horror at frequent intervals27 and in fitting terms. Then Jack listened to a long and solemn lecture which was more wordy than pithy28, and was told that he must avoid even exciting subjects of thought for a fortnight to come.
"Mayn't Matt come to see me?" asked Jack in faltering29 tones.
"Only for two or three minutes at a time," said the doctor; "even conversation will excite you."
"I want to talk to him," said Jack.
"Why can't you talk to your mother and me?" asked the doctor.
It is beyond all things astonishing what silly questions may be asked by sensible men when they have forgotten their own boyhood days, and it is not surprising that Jack could not easily frame an answer to the doctor's question.
"Did Matt ever feed or clothe you?" asked the doctor.
Jack admitted, with some trifling30 modifications31 of the first condition, that Matt had not.
"Did he ever give you a home, or take care of you when you were sick, or pay your school bills?"
Jack shook his head.
"Then why can't you care so much for your mother and me as you do for him?" continued the doctor.
Jack was silent.
"It's because you're an ungrateful young scamp," exclaimed the doctor with considerable temper, as he arose and left the room.
"Father," shouted Jack, "it isn't! Please come back?"
The doctor, considerably32 startled by such an exhibition of feeling, hastily returned.
"Father," said Jack, turning his head in spite of considerable pain which the motion inflicted33 upon his arm, "it's because—because Matt's a boy."
"Umph!" exclaimed the doctor, "that is a reason—a wonderful reason. I should think you would want to have it patented, or copyrighted, or something."
The doctor retired34, pondering upon human depravity as exemplified by ingratitude35, and Jack, having plenty of time, began to devise some way of shaming his father out of so unjust an idea as that his boy was ungrateful. When he became a man and a steamboat captain he would bring all the doctor's medicines free of charge—perhaps that wouldn't heap coals of fire upon the old gentleman's head—oh, no! Indeed, he was not sure but he might one day become a missionary—missionaries must have jolly times on tropical islands where they can always go about in their shirt sleeves, have for nothing all the bananas they can eat, and shoot lions, and birds of paradise, and things, right from their own doors. Perhaps when he sent his father a tiger-skin rug, and his mother a whole lot of ostrich37 plumes38, and a monkey, and some cunning heathen gods to put on her parlor39 mantel, his father would talk about ingratitude then, but Jack rather guessed not! Then when his mother came in with a plate of water-toast, Jack surprised her by remarking.
"Mother, when marble time comes, I'll give you all the buttons I win."
"What do you mean, Jack?" said the lady.
"Why, we play marbles for buttons sometimes, and there's only two or three boys in town that can beat me, and I never play with them."
"Where do they get the buttons to bet?" asked Mrs. Wittingham, "and," she continued, a dire40 suspicion coming suddenly to mind, "where do you get them?"
"I—I don't know," said Jack feebly, at which answer his mother sniffed41 alarmingly, and left Jack to feel that grown folks were most shamefully42 suspicious, and that they couldn't appreciate gratitude36 when it was offered them.
Two or three days later the fever set in, and Jack dreamed for days of Polar explorations, where he could go swimming in cooling seas and sun himself dry on iridescent43 icebergs44. He planned a wonderful voyage of discovery to the North Pole, and it was of inestimable comfort to him to report progress to Matt, in the five minutes which that youth was allowed daily at the sufferer's bedside. The tenor45 of his thoughts was daily interrupted by his mother, who considered the occasion demanded Bible reading instead of personal sympathy for the youth, who could not leave his bed to attend family prayers, and she so frequently selected passages descriptive of a locality the temperature of which is the reverse of polar, that Jack had to do a great deal of mental rambling46 to get his thoughts in proper trim again.
At last the fever subsided47 leaving Jack extremely weak in body, but of a temper simply angelic. He prefaced every request with "please," he never forgot to say "thank you," and he sang little hymns48 softly to himself. Mrs. Wittingham was delighted beyond measure, and when she suggested that the minister might like to call, and Jack replied that it would be very nice to have a chat with that gentleman, the lady became considerably alarmed on the subject of the boy's recovery. Mr. Daybright, the minister, was really a very pleasant man, as Jack discovered, now that he had time to "take his measure," as he himself expressed it, and after Mr. Daybright had talked with him for half an hour, and prayed with him, and departed, Jack did not know but he might finally conclude to be a minister himself, and have cake and cider offered him in the middle of the afternoon when he called upon boys with broken arms.
Then Jack's Sunday-school teacher called, and suggested that the class should come in a body, on the following Sunday, and Jack accepted the suggestion with fervor49, and the class came, and stood decorously in a row, and sang several hymns, and looked as sober as if fish-lines and peg-tops and balls and birds' nests and orchards50 and crooked51 pins and truancy52 did not exist anywhere nearer than the planet Neptune53. Then the teacher gave Jack a book from the Sunday-school library, which book he had selected with Jack's particular condition of mind in view, and although it proved to be the story of a dreadfully priggish but very pious54 little London footman, whose nature, tastes, temptations and general environment were utterly unlike Jack's, the boy labored55 manfully through it, and endeavored to persuade himself that he enjoyed it.
In fact, so thorough an overhauling56 did Jack's conscience receive that he even felt himself called upon to confess to the doctor his affair with Hoccamine's whiskey, but although the doctor had heard the story a month before from the lips of Matt's father, he had not yet reached that mental balance which would enable him to reprove the boy and still leave him impressed with a sense of the vileness57 of the rum traffic, so the doctor said only "Well," in a very grave way, and made an excuse to leave the sick chamber58.
A few days later Jack was allowed to sit under the great trees in front of the house, and as he was positively59 forbidden to leave the grounds, to run, or to make any exertion60 which might disturb the arm, which he carried in a sling61, he fell to noting the habits of birds with their young, until he became so affected62 that he silently vowed63 never to rob a nest again. He found in the flowers and the shrubbery many a charm which he had never suspected when weeding them; he contemplated64 cloud pictures until an overwhelming sense of the beautiful compelled him to decide upon an artistic65 career, and he watched every motion of whatever laborer66 happened to be in sight until he determined67 that he never again would throw a chip or anything else at a laboring68 man, no matter how funny he might look or how fluently he could swear when he espied69 his tormentor70.
Finally, to the delight of his parents and many other people who were responsible for boys, but to the general depression of the boys themselves, it became known that Jack had signified his intention of joining the church. Mr. Daybright admitted that in years Jack was rather young to take such a step, but, on the other hand, he had a far abler mind, and—even although he was called the worst boy in town—a cleaner record than half the adults who came into the fold. Mr. Daybright had explained to him, as men often will to boys other than their own, that boys need not stop being boys and being happy just because they become good, so there was considerable disappointment experienced by such youths as shrewdly imagined that Jack's change of heart would result in his large and varied71 assortment72 of knives, lines, marbles, skates, etc., being thrown upon the market at reduced prices. Jack explained, with considerable vigor73, that because he was going to give up mischief74 it did not necessarily follow that he should become a muff, or a soft head, or a twiddler, or an apron75 string, or a foo-foo, or a stick-in-the-mud, or a dummy76, or any other of a dozen or two unpopular varieties of boy which he mentioned, but that he proposed to "keep his shirt on," remain "forked end down," retain possession of his eye-teeth, and have as good a time as anybody else could who didn't have to suffer for it afterward77. And the unregenerate boys went away slowly and without the great possessions which they had expected to carry with them, while one of them who was generous as well as shrewd was heard to say that bully78 old Jack Wittingham wasn't going to flunk79 out after all, and that a fellow could do many a worse thing than to join the church.
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1
consolation
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| n.安慰，慰问 | |
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jack
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| n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克 | |
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conjure
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| v.恳求，祈求；变魔术，变戏法 | |
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undoubtedly
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| adv.确实地，无疑地 | |
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offense
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| n.犯规，违法行为；冒犯，得罪 | |
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nervously
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| adv.神情激动地，不安地 | |
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7
subside
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| vi.平静，平息；下沉，塌陷，沉降 | |
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8
subsiding
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| v.（土地）下陷（因在地下采矿）( subside的现在分词 )；减弱；下降至较低或正常水平；一下子坐在椅子等上 | |
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9
utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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gasped
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| v.喘气( gasp的过去式和过去分词 )；喘息；倒抽气；很想要 | |
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11
eliciting
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| n. 诱发, 引出 动词elicit的现在分词形式 | |
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sobbing
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| <主方>Ⅰ adj.湿透的 | |
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13
sobbed
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| 哭泣，啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 )； 哭诉，呜咽地说 | |
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perch
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| n.栖木，高位，杆；v.栖息，就位，位于 | |
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15
horrid
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| adj.可怕的；令人惊恐的；恐怖的；极讨厌的 | |
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remonstrated
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| v.抗议( remonstrate的过去式和过去分词 )；告诫 | |
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17
judgment
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| n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见 | |
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18
chuckle
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| vi.／n.轻声笑，咯咯笑 | |
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infliction
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| n.（强加于人身的）痛苦，刑罚 | |
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lotion
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| n.洗剂 | |
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21
previously
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| adv.以前，先前（地） | |
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vivacious
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| adj.活泼的，快活的 | |
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outraged
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| a.震惊的，义愤填膺的 | |
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24
delightful
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| adj.令人高兴的，使人快乐的 | |
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25
capers
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| n.开玩笑( caper的名词复数 )；刺山柑v.跳跃，雀跃( caper的第三人称单数 ) | |
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26
judicial
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| adj.司法的，法庭的，审判的，明断的，公正的 | |
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27
intervals
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| n.[军事]间隔( interval的名词复数 )；间隔时间；[数学]区间；（戏剧、电影或音乐会的）幕间休息 | |
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28
pithy
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| adj.(讲话或文章)简练的 | |
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faltering
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| 犹豫的，支吾的，蹒跚的 | |
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trifling
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| adj.微不足道的；没什么价值的 | |
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modifications
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| n.缓和( modification的名词复数 )；限制；更改；改变 | |
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32
considerably
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| adv.极大地；相当大地；在很大程度上 | |
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33
inflicted
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| 把…强加给，使承受，遭受( inflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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retired
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| adj.隐退的，退休的，退役的 | |
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35
ingratitude
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| n.忘恩负义 | |
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36
gratitude
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| adj.感激，感谢 | |
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ostrich
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| n.鸵鸟 | |
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38
plumes
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| 羽毛( plume的名词复数 )； 羽毛饰； 羽毛状物； 升上空中的羽状物 | |
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39
parlor
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| n.店铺，营业室；会客室，客厅 | |
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40
dire
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| adj.可怕的，悲惨的，阴惨的，极端的 | |
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41
sniffed
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| v.以鼻吸气，嗅，闻( sniff的过去式和过去分词 )；抽鼻子（尤指哭泣、患感冒等时出声地用鼻子吸气）；抱怨，不以为然地说 | |
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42
shamefully
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| 可耻地； 丢脸地； 不体面地； 羞耻地 | |
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43
iridescent
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| adj.彩虹色的，闪色的 | |
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44
icebergs
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| n.冰山，流冰( iceberg的名词复数 ) | |
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45
tenor
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| n.男高音（歌手），次中音（乐器），要旨，大意 | |
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46
rambling
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| adj.[建]凌乱的，杂乱的 | |
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47
subsided
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| v.（土地）下陷（因在地下采矿）( subside的过去式和过去分词 )；减弱；下降至较低或正常水平；一下子坐在椅子等上 | |
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48
hymns
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| n.赞美诗，圣歌，颂歌( hymn的名词复数 ) | |
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49
fervor
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| n.热诚；热心；炽热 | |
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50
orchards
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| （通常指围起来的）果园( orchard的名词复数 ) | |
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51
crooked
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| adj.弯曲的；不诚实的，狡猾的，不正当的 | |
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52
truancy
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| n.逃学，旷课 | |
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53
Neptune
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| n.海王星 | |
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54
pious
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| adj.虔诚的；道貌岸然的 | |
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55
labored
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| adj.吃力的，谨慎的v.努力争取(for)( labor的过去式和过去分词 )；苦干；详细分析；（指引擎）缓慢而困难地运转 | |
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56
overhauling
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| n.大修；拆修；卸修；翻修v.彻底检查( overhaul的现在分词 )；大修；赶上；超越 | |
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57
vileness
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| n.讨厌，卑劣 | |
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58
chamber
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| n.房间，寝室；会议厅；议院；会所 | |
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positively
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| adv.明确地，断然，坚决地；实在，确实 | |
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exertion
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| n.尽力，努力 | |
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61
sling
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| vt.扔；悬挂；n.挂带；吊索，吊兜；弹弓 | |
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62
affected
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| adj.不自然的，假装的 | |
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63
vowed
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| 起誓，发誓（vow的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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64
contemplated
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| adj. 预期的 动词contemplate的过去分词形式 | |
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artistic
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| adj.艺术(家)的，美术(家)的；善于艺术创作的 | |
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laborer
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| n.劳动者，劳工 | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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laboring
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| n.劳动，操劳v.努力争取(for)( labor的现在分词 )；苦干；详细分析；（指引擎）缓慢而困难地运转 | |
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69
espied
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| v.看到( espy的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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70
tormentor
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| n. 使苦痛之人, 使苦恼之物, 侧幕 =tormenter | |
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71
varied
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| adj.多样的，多变化的 | |
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72
assortment
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| n.分类，各色俱备之物，聚集 | |
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73
vigor
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| n.活力，精力，元气 | |
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74
mischief
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| n.损害，伤害，危害；恶作剧，捣蛋，胡闹 | |
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apron
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| n.围裙；工作裙 | |
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76
dummy
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| n.假的东西；(哄婴儿的)橡皮奶头 | |
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77
afterward
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| adv.后来；以后 | |
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78
bully
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| n.恃强欺弱者，小流氓；vt.威胁，欺侮 | |
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flunk
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| v.(考试)不及格(=fail) | |
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