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Chapter 3
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  A conversation with Mr. Merton on Society. Mr. and Mrs. James, ofSutton, come up. A miserable1 evening at the Tank Theatre. Experimentswith enamel2 paint. I make another good joke; but Gowing andCummings are unnecessarily offended. I paint the bath red, withunexpected result.

  April 19. - Cummings called, bringing with him his friend Merton,who is in the wine trade. Gowing also called. Mr. Merton madehimself at home at once, and Carrie and I were both struck with himimmediately, and thoroughly3 approved of his sentiments.

  He leaned back in his chair and said: "You must take me as I am;"and I replied: "Yes - and you must take us as we are. We're homelypeople, we are not swells4."He answered: "No, I can see that," and Gowing roared with laughter;but Merton in a most gentlemanly manner said to Gowing: "I don't thinkyou quite understand me. I intended to convey that our charming hostand hostess were superior to the follies5 of fashion, and preferred leading asimple and wholesome6 life to gadding7 about to twopenny-halfpenny tea-drinking afternoons, and living above their incomes."I was immensely pleased with these sensible remarks of Merton's, andconcluded that subject by saying: "No, candidly8, Mr. Merton, we don'tgo into Society, because we do not care for it; and what with the expenseof cabs here and cabs there, and white gloves and white ties, etc., it doesn'tseem worth the money."Merton said in reference to FRIENDS: "My motto is 'Few and True;'

  and, by the way, I also apply that to wine, 'Little and Good.'" Gowing said:

  "Yes, and sometimes 'cheap and tasty,' eh, old man?" Merton, stillcontinuing, said he should treat me as a friend, and put me down for adozen of his "Lockanbar" whisky, and as I was an old friend of Gowing, Ishould have it for 36s., which was considerably9 under what he paid for it.

  He booked his own order, and further said that at any time I wanted any passes for the theatre I was to let him know, as his name stood goodfor any theatre in London.

  April 20. - Carrie reminded me that as her old school friend, AnnieFullers (now Mrs. James), and her husband had come up from Sutton for afew days, it would look kind to take them to the theatre, and would I dropa line to Mr. Merton asking him for passes for four, either for the ItalianOpera, Haymarket, Savoy, or Lyceum. I wrote Merton to that effect.

  April 21. - Got a reply from Merton, saying he was very busy, and justat present couldn't manage passes for the Italian Opera, Haymarket, Savoy,or Lyceum, but the best thing going on in London was the BROWNBUSHES, at the Tank Theatre, Islington, and enclosed seats for four; alsobill for whisky.

  April 23. - Mr. and Mrs. James (Miss Fullers that was) came to meattea, and we left directly after for the Tank Theatre. We got a 'bus thattook us to King's Cross, and then changed into one that took us to the"Angel." Mr. James each time insisted on paying for all, saying that Ihad paid for the tickets and that was quite enough.

  We arrived at theatre, where, curiously10 enough, all our 'bus-loadexcept an old woman with a basket seemed to be going in. I walkedahead and presented the tickets. The man looked at them, and called out:

  "Mr. Willowly! do you know anything about these?" holding up my tickets.

  The gentleman called to, came up and examined my tickets, and said:

  "Who gave you these?" I said, rather indignantly: "Mr. Merton, ofcourse." He said: "Merton? Who's he?" I answered, rather sharply:

  "You ought to know, his name's good at any theatre in London." Hereplied: "Oh! is it? Well, it ain't no good here. These tickets, which arenot dated, were issued under Mr. Swinstead's management, which hassince changed hands." While I was having some very unpleasant wordswith the man, James, who had gone upstairs with the ladies, called out:

  "Come on!" I went up after them, and a very civil attendant said: "Thisway, please, box H." I said to James: "Why, how on earth did youmanage it?" and to my horror he replied: "Why, paid for it of course."This was humiliating enough, and I could scarcely follow the play, butI was doomed11 to still further humiliation12. I was leaning out of the box, when my tie - a little black bow which fastened on to the stud by means ofa new patent - fell into the pit below. A clumsy man not noticing it, hadhis foot on it for ever so long before he discovered it. He then picked itup and eventually flung it under the next seat in disgust. What with thebox incident and the tie, I felt quite miserable. Mr. James, of Sutton, wasvery good. He said: "Don't worry - no one will notice it with yourbeard. That is the only advantage of growing one that I can see." Therewas no occasion for that remark, for Carrie is very proud of my beard.

  To hide the absence of the tie I had to keep my chin down the rest ofthe evening, which caused a pain at the back of my neck.

  April 24. - Could scarcely sleep a wink13 through thinking of havingbrought up Mr. and Mrs. James from the country to go to the theatre lastnight, and his having paid for a private box because our order was nothonoured, and such a poor play too. I wrote a very satirical letter toMerton, the wine merchant, who gave us the pass, and said, "Consideringwe had to pay for our seats, we did our best to appreciate theperformance." I thought this line rather cutting, and I asked Carrie howmany p's there were in appreciate, and she said, "One." After I sent offthe letter I looked at the dictionary and found there were two. Awfullyvexed at this.

  Decided14 not to worry myself any more about the James's; for, as Carriewisely said, "We'll make it all right with them by asking them up fromSutton one evening next week to play at Bezique."April 25. - In consequence of Brickwell telling me his wife wasworking wonders with the new Pinkford's enamel paint, I determined15 totry it. I bought two tins of red on my way home. I hastened through tea,went into the garden and painted some flower-pots. I called out Carrie,who said: "You've always got some newfangled craze;" but she wasobliged to admit that the flower-pots looked remarkably16 well. Wentupstairs into the servant's bedroom and painted her washstand, towel-horse,and chest of drawers. To my mind it was an extraordinary improvement,but as an example of the ignorance of the lower classes in the matter oftaste, our servant, Sarah, on seeing them, evinced no sign of pleasure, butmerely said "she thought they looked very well as they was before." April 26. - Got some more red enamel paint (red, to my mind, beingthe best colour), and painted the coal-scuttle, and the backs of ourSHAKSPEARE, the binding17 of which had almost worn out.

  April 27. - Painted the bath red, and was delighted with the result.

  Sorry to say Carrie was not, in fact we had a few words about it. Shesaid I ought to have consulted her, and she had never heard of such a thingas a bath being painted red. I replied: "It's merely a matter of taste."Fortunately, further argument on the subject was stopped by a voicesaying, "May I come in?" It was only Cummings, who said, "Your maidopened the door, and asked me to excuse her showing me in, as she waswringing out some socks." I was delighted to see him, and suggested weshould have a game of whist with a dummy18, and by way of merriment said:

  "You can be the dummy." Cummings (I thought rather ill-naturedly)replied: "Funny as usual." He said he couldn't stop, he only called toleave me the BICYCLE NEWS, as he had done with it.

  Another ring at the bell; it was Gowing, who said he "must apologisefor coming so often, and that one of these days we must come round toHIM." I said: "A very extraordinary thing has struck me.""Something funny, as usual," said Cummings. "Yes," I replied; "I thinkeven you will say so this time. It's concerning you both; for doesn't itseem odd that Gowing's always coming and Cummings' always going?"Carrie, who had evidently quite forgotten about the bath, went into fits oflaughter, and as for myself, I fairly doubled up in my chair, till it crackedbeneath me. I think this was one of the best jokes I have ever made.

  Then imagine my astonishment19 on perceiving both Cummings andGowing perfectly20 silent, and without a smile on their faces. After ratheran unpleasant pause, Cummings, who had opened a cigar-case, closed itup again and said: "Yes - I think, after that, I SHALL be going, and I amsorry I fail to see the fun of your jokes." Gowing said he didn't mind ajoke when it wasn't rude, but a pun on a name, to his thinking, wascertainly a little wanting in good taste. Cummings followed it up bysaying, if it had been said by anyone else but myself, he shouldn't haveentered the house again. This rather unpleasantly terminated what mighthave been a cheerful evening. However, it was as well they went, for the charwoman had finished up the remains21 of the cold pork.

  April 28. - At the office, the new and very young clerk Pitt, who wasvery impudent22 to me a week or so ago, was late again. I told him itwould be my duty to inform Mr. Perkupp, the principal. To my surprise,Pitt apologised most humbly23 and in a most gentlemanly fashion. I wasunfeignedly pleased to notice this improvement in his manner towards me,and told him I would look over his unpunctuality. Passing down theroom an hour later. I received a smart smack24 in the face from a rolled-upball of hard foolscap. I turned round sharply, but all the clerks wereapparently riveted25 to their work. I am not a rich man, but I would givehalf-a-sovereign to know whether that was thrown by accident or design.

  Went home early and bought some more enamel paint - black this timeand spent the evening touching26 up the fender, picture-frames, and an oldpair of boots, making them look as good as new. Also painted Gowing'swalking-stick, which he left behind, and made it look like ebony.

  April 29, Sunday. - Woke up with a fearful headache and strongsymptoms of a cold. Carrie, with a perversity27 which is just like her, saidit was "painter's colic," and was the result of my having spent the last fewdays with my nose over a paint-pot. I told her firmly that I knew a greatdeal better what was the matter with me than she did. I had got a chill,and decided to have a bath as hot as I could bear it. Bath ready - couldscarcely bear it so hot. I persevered28, and got in; very hot, but veryacceptable. I lay still for some time.

  On moving my hand above the surface of the water, I experienced thegreatest fright I ever received in the whole course of my life; for imaginemy horror on discovering my hand, as I thought, full of blood. My firstthought was that I had ruptured29 an artery30, and was bleeding to death, andshould be discovered, later on, looking like a second Marat, as I rememberseeing him in Madame Tussaud's. My second thought was to ring thebell, but remembered there was no bell to ring. My third was, that therewas nothing but the enamel paint, which had dissolved with boiling water.

  I stepped out of the bath, perfectly red all over, resembling the Red IndiansI have seen depicted31 at an East-End theatre. I determined not to say aword to Carrie, but to tell Farmerson to come on Monday and paint the bath white.


点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 miserable g18yk     
adj.悲惨的,痛苦的;可怜的,糟糕的
参考例句:
  • It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他,这是可耻的。
  • Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。
2 enamel jZ4zF     
n.珐琅,搪瓷,瓷釉;(牙齿的)珐琅质
参考例句:
  • I chipped the enamel on my front tooth when I fell over.我跌倒时门牙的珐琅质碰碎了。
  • He collected coloured enamel bowls from Yugoslavia.他藏有来自南斯拉夫的彩色搪瓷碗。
3 thoroughly sgmz0J     
adv.完全地,彻底地,十足地
参考例句:
  • The soil must be thoroughly turned over before planting.一定要先把土地深翻一遍再下种。
  • The soldiers have been thoroughly instructed in the care of their weapons.士兵们都系统地接受过保护武器的训练。
4 swells e5cc2e057ee1aff52e79fb6af45c685d     
增强( swell的第三人称单数 ); 肿胀; (使)凸出; 充满(激情)
参考例句:
  • The waters were heaving up in great swells. 河水正在急剧上升。
  • A barrel swells in the middle. 水桶中部隆起。
5 follies e0e754f59d4df445818b863ea1aa3eba     
罪恶,时事讽刺剧; 愚蠢,蠢笨,愚蠢的行为、思想或做法( folly的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • He has given up youthful follies. 他不再做年轻人的荒唐事了。
  • The writings of Swift mocked the follies of his age. 斯威夫特的作品嘲弄了他那个时代的愚人。
6 wholesome Uowyz     
adj.适合;卫生的;有益健康的;显示身心健康的
参考例句:
  • In actual fact the things I like doing are mostly wholesome.实际上我喜欢做的事大都是有助于增进身体健康的。
  • It is not wholesome to eat without washing your hands.不洗手吃饭是不卫生的。
7 gadding a7889528acccca0f7df39cd69638af06     
n.叮搔症adj.蔓生的v.闲逛( gad的现在分词 );游荡;找乐子;用铁棒刺
参考例句:
  • She likes gadding about while the children are at school. 孩子们在学校里的时候,她喜欢到处逛逛。 来自辞典例句
  • We spent the whole day gadding about Paris. 我们一整天都在巴黎游玩。 来自辞典例句
8 candidly YxwzQ1     
adv.坦率地,直率而诚恳地
参考例句:
  • He has stopped taking heroin now,but admits candidly that he will always be a drug addict.他眼下已经不再吸食海洛因了,不过他坦言自己永远都是个瘾君子。
  • Candidly,David,I think you're being unreasonable.大卫,说实话我认为你不讲道理。
9 considerably 0YWyQ     
adv.极大地;相当大地;在很大程度上
参考例句:
  • The economic situation has changed considerably.经济形势已发生了相当大的变化。
  • The gap has narrowed considerably.分歧大大缩小了。
10 curiously 3v0zIc     
adv.有求知欲地;好问地;奇特地
参考例句:
  • He looked curiously at the people.他好奇地看着那些人。
  • He took long stealthy strides. His hands were curiously cold.他迈着悄没声息的大步。他的双手出奇地冷。
11 doomed EuuzC1     
命定的
参考例句:
  • The court doomed the accused to a long term of imprisonment. 法庭判处被告长期监禁。
  • A country ruled by an iron hand is doomed to suffer. 被铁腕人物统治的国家定会遭受不幸的。
12 humiliation Jd3zW     
n.羞辱
参考例句:
  • He suffered the humiliation of being forced to ask for his cards.他蒙受了被迫要求辞职的羞辱。
  • He will wish to revenge his humiliation in last Season's Final.他会为在上个季度的决赛中所受的耻辱而报复的。
13 wink 4MGz3     
n.眨眼,使眼色,瞬间;v.眨眼,使眼色,闪烁
参考例句:
  • He tipped me the wink not to buy at that price.他眨眼暗示我按那个价格就不要买。
  • The satellite disappeared in a wink.瞬息之间,那颗卫星就消失了。
14 decided lvqzZd     
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的
参考例句:
  • This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
  • There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。
15 determined duszmP     
adj.坚定的;有决心的
参考例句:
  • I have determined on going to Tibet after graduation.我已决定毕业后去西藏。
  • He determined to view the rooms behind the office.他决定查看一下办公室后面的房间。
16 remarkably EkPzTW     
ad.不同寻常地,相当地
参考例句:
  • I thought she was remarkably restrained in the circumstances. 我认为她在那种情况下非常克制。
  • He made a remarkably swift recovery. 他康复得相当快。
17 binding 2yEzWb     
有约束力的,有效的,应遵守的
参考例句:
  • The contract was not signed and has no binding force. 合同没有签署因而没有约束力。
  • Both sides have agreed that the arbitration will be binding. 双方都赞同仲裁具有约束力。
18 dummy Jrgx7     
n.假的东西;(哄婴儿的)橡皮奶头
参考例句:
  • The police suspect that the device is not a real bomb but a dummy.警方怀疑那个装置不是真炸弹,只是一个假货。
  • The boys played soldier with dummy swords made of wood.男孩们用木头做的假木剑玩打仗游戏。
19 astonishment VvjzR     
n.惊奇,惊异
参考例句:
  • They heard him give a loud shout of astonishment.他们听见他惊奇地大叫一声。
  • I was filled with astonishment at her strange action.我对她的奇怪举动不胜惊异。
20 perfectly 8Mzxb     
adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地
参考例句:
  • The witnesses were each perfectly certain of what they said.证人们个个对自己所说的话十分肯定。
  • Everything that we're doing is all perfectly above board.我们做的每件事情都是光明正大的。
21 remains 1kMzTy     
n.剩余物,残留物;遗体,遗迹
参考例句:
  • He ate the remains of food hungrily.他狼吞虎咽地吃剩余的食物。
  • The remains of the meal were fed to the dog.残羹剩饭喂狗了。
22 impudent X4Eyf     
adj.鲁莽的,卑鄙的,厚颜无耻的
参考例句:
  • She's tolerant toward those impudent colleagues.她对那些无礼的同事采取容忍的态度。
  • The teacher threatened to kick the impudent pupil out of the room.老师威胁着要把这无礼的小学生撵出教室。
23 humbly humbly     
adv. 恭顺地,谦卑地
参考例句:
  • We humbly beg Your Majesty to show mercy. 我们恳请陛下发发慈悲。
  • "You must be right, Sir,'said John humbly. “你一定是对的,先生,”约翰恭顺地说道。
24 smack XEqzV     
vt.拍,打,掴;咂嘴;vi.含有…意味;n.拍
参考例句:
  • She gave him a smack on the face.她打了他一个嘴巴。
  • I gave the fly a smack with the magazine.我用杂志拍了一下苍蝇。
25 riveted ecef077186c9682b433fa17f487ee017     
铆接( rivet的过去式和过去分词 ); 把…固定住; 吸引; 引起某人的注意
参考例句:
  • I was absolutely riveted by her story. 我完全被她的故事吸引住了。
  • My attention was riveted by a slight movement in the bushes. 我的注意力被灌木丛中的轻微晃动吸引住了。
26 touching sg6zQ9     
adj.动人的,使人感伤的
参考例句:
  • It was a touching sight.这是一幅动人的景象。
  • His letter was touching.他的信很感人。
27 perversity D3kzJ     
n.任性;刚愎自用
参考例句:
  • She's marrying him out of sheer perversity.她嫁给他纯粹是任性。
  • The best of us have a spice of perversity in us.在我们最出色的人身上都有任性的一面。
28 persevered b3246393c709e55e93de64dc63360d37     
v.坚忍,坚持( persevere的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • She persevered with her violin lessons. 她孜孜不倦地学习小提琴。
  • Hard as the conditions were, he persevered in his studies. 虽然条件艰苦,但他仍坚持学习。 来自辞典例句
29 ruptured 077b042156149d8d522b697413b3801c     
v.(使)破裂( rupture的过去式和过去分词 );(使体内组织等)断裂;使(友好关系)破裂;使绝交
参考例句:
  • They reported that the pipeline had ruptured. 他们报告说管道已经破裂了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • The wall through Berlin was finally ruptured, prefiguring the reunification of Germany. 柏林墙终于倒塌了,预示着德国的重新统一。 来自辞典例句
30 artery 5ekyE     
n.干线,要道;动脉
参考例句:
  • We couldn't feel the changes in the blood pressure within the artery.我们无法感觉到动脉血管内血压的变化。
  • The aorta is the largest artery in the body.主动脉是人体中的最大动脉。
31 depicted f657dbe7a96d326c889c083bf5fcaf24     
描绘,描画( depict的过去式和过去分词 ); 描述
参考例句:
  • Other animals were depicted on the periphery of the group. 其他动物在群像的外围加以修饰。
  • They depicted the thrilling situation to us in great detail. 他们向我们详细地描述了那激动人心的场面。


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